So here's what you missed on Glee:
Rachel choked at her NYADA audition, which meant she blew
the biggest audition of her life. Oh, God.
Which, as far as she's concerned, is now
pretty much over. I had my chance and I choked.
Quinn's in a wheelchair, but her rehab's going well,
partly because Joe's been going with her.
Brittany probably forgot she was
elected senior class president.
And Puck failed his big geography exam
about Iberian precipitation,
which means he's not gonna graduate.
And that's what you missed on Glee.
Everything dies.
Maybe the saddest death of all
is the death of a dream.
For 18 years, I've had Broadway, stardom.
It was like wings that kept me hovering above the fray.
But I flew too close to the sun and now they're gone
and I'm just Rachel Barbra Berry of Lima, Ohio...
a flightless bird.
A penguin.
Do I look different?
I feel different.
In some ways, it's a relief... to be part of the crowd.
My dreams are smaller now, maybe even more real...
the wedding, winning Nationals... but first, prom.
I'll never walk the red carpet
as a Tony or Golden Globe nominee.
That's what you get for having no backup plan.
Prom is my night to trip the light fantastic.
Next to my wedding, my prom dress will be
the most important gown I ever wear.
I'm surprisingly okay with it all.
That dream was just a favorite old sweater that I kept around
even though it didn't fit anymore.
I can grieve it and move on.
I may have lost NYADA, but I still have Finn.
So I'm not going to get
everything I thought I ever wanted.
Doesn't make me a loser.
What are you doing?
I am practicing my Prom Queen victory wave.
I'm going to win.
You know, there's a lot of stiff competition this year, Becky.
I wouldn't want you to be disappointed.
Would you mind taking your loser talk somewhere else?
I don't want to catch your failure.
Sexy teen trollop.
Many months ago,
to much fanfare,
you were elected senior class president.
Oh, yeah. Since that day,
you have accomplished nothing except one memorandum
written in crayon saying
"Drill, baby, drill."
Yeah, I no longer believe we should be drilling for babies.
Your do-nothing presidency has me seriously considering
abolishing the post altogether.
And as you are flunking each of your classes,
you need class president
on your transcript if you hope to gain admittance into college.
No, I don't. I've already been accepted at Perdue.
The university?
No, the chicken factory.
Miss Pierce, you are making a mockery
of this student government,
and if you don't make an impact with the rest of your term,
your presidency will be this school's last!
I now realize I wasted an entire year belaboring the nuances
of my fluid teen sexuality and getting caught up
in Lord Tubbington's Ponzi schemes.
Then for a while, I stopped talking.
But I don't want my presidency to be the last one at McKinley.
I don't want that to be my legacy.
Well, Madame President, prom is coming up.
And if you want to rehabilitate your image,
perhaps that's where you should start.
Okay.
I don't know who any of you guys are.
Oh, we're the Prom Committee.
We've been meeting since September.
We've sent you 14 memos.
Did you get my memo about drilling for babies?
No.
Good. 'Cause that's not
the solution to soaring gas prices.
We're a little behind schedule,
but we think we have a great theme for this year's prom.
Cool. This year's prom theme
is...
"Castles in the Clouds."
Nice.
I like your unicorns; Those are great.
But I'm gonna have to say never,
'cause there's no way I'm ever gonna let that happen.
Castles are very heavy,
so putting them on clouds would be extremely dangerous.
I seriously think the three of you should be put in jail.
Okay.
Um, what about... "Stairway to Heaven"?
Not unless we also build
escalators to heaven for the disabled students.
Plus, I'm not
really sure if they're even allowed into heaven.
It's clear that the three of you are incompetent fools,
possibly some sort of terrorist cell.
So, as president, I'm gonna decide
what the prom theme is going to be this year.
And I think... that it should be...
"Dinosaurs."
Dinosaurs?!
Yeah.
The Bible told me that dinosaurs and cavemen lived side by side
for millions of years in peace,
and I think that's something
that we should totally celebrate.
No, you can't be serious.
That's the worst prom theme ever.
When you insult my dinosaur prom theme, that's bullying,
and I will not accept it.
By the power vested in me as president, you are all fired.
Sorry, Rachel, that includes you.
But I guess
I'll see you in Glee Club, so...
Good meeting, guys.
Good morning, McKinley High!
First of all, to those of you thoughtful enough to leave
maternity gifts outside my office,
both I and my unborn child thank you
for your lackluster Cracker Barrel meat-and-cheese medleys,
and I'm sure that
my trash can will find them delicious.
Now it's time
to announce this year's Senior Prom Court nominees.
Your choices for Prom King are...
Rick "The Stick" Nelson.
Yeah!
You know this!
President Brittany S. Pierce.
That's weird.
And also, Finn Hudson.
And now on to the category we all really care about:
Prom Queen.
Becky for Prom Queen 2012!
Missy Gunderson.
Santana Lopez.
And Quinn Fabray.
Congratulations to all our nominees...
Becky, Becky, Becky! That's an antique!
I was robbed, Coach!
So are you bummed you didn't get nominated for Prom Queen?
In what world would I ever be nominated for Prom Queen?
Well, I voted for you.
And I got that crossed-eyed dude
in my study hall to vote for you, too.
That's very sweet of you, but I'm not upset at all actually,
because I am gonna be spending my entire prom night
dancing with my devastatingly handsome future husband to be.
We'll make your posters later, okay?
Okay!
A big congrats to all our prom nominees!
But, hey, listen up.
We are all winners,
because Principal Figgins
asked New Directions to sing again this year!
Come on!
Fantastic.
All right.
Brittany has an announcement.
Hello, my fellow Americans.
The theme for this year's prom will be...
"Dinosaurs."
Sheer genius.
Thanks.
I was inspired by the new girl Joe,
who reminds me of a cavewoman.
The refreshments will be berries,
meat and rainwater.
As you are no doubt aware,
the U.S. elections are riddled with corruption.
Therefore, to keep the prom elections
completely aboveboard, I have appointed Santana
and Quinn to count the ballots.
What? That makes no sense!
Shut it, Richard Simmons.
Yes, Quinn's my homegirl, but I don't trust her,
and you know she doesn't trust me.
We'll keep each other honest.
You know,
It's actually not a bad idea.
And last but not least,
all hair gel has been banned from the prom.
Right.
I'm actually not joking.
Hair gel was not invented until
almost 30 million years after the Upper Paleolithic Stone Age.
And frankly,
I don't like the way you look.
Therefore, anyone who
shows up to prom wearing hair gel will be
turned away at the door.
I hereby decree this to be the best prom
Ever.
Okay.
Let's start thinking of... dinosaur songs.
Hey, did you know about this?
I know you knew about this 'cause it was hung
at eye level and I know Quinn couldn't reach up
that high to put it there. Whoa, whoa.
Remember when I told you that if you come at me
with the crazy right off the bat that my head goes all empty
and I can't really have a productive conversation?
This isn't crazy, this is mad, this is hurt.
This isn't a big deal. Not a big deal?
I'm gonna have to watch my fiancé dance in front of
the entire school with his ex-girlfriend at my senior prom.
If you haven't noticed, Quinn can't dance.
She just about died coming to our wedding.
She asked me if I would campaign with her,
and I figured it was the least I could do for our friend.
I can't believe how selfish you're being.
Yeah, well, if you haven't noticed,
I'm kind of having a bad week myself.
I can't believe that my entire high school career is gonna end
the exact same way it started... just some sad little Jewish girl
watching you get all the attention
with the pretty blonde cheerleader. Oh...
Come on.
Good, good, good. Come on.
All right, now let go of your hands.
You got this. Just-just let go.
I promise you'll be okay.
You got it.
Good.
Come on.
This is all you. Look at you.
You have it. Just-just...
No-no-no-no-no!
Are you okay?
Yeah, I'm okay. I knew you could do it.
That was fantastic.
You're amazing.
Thank you for always coming with me.
Totally selfish.
I get to hang with you.
Take a break, then let's show everyone.
Glee and...
No, no.
Why? This is huge.
Because it has to be real.
I mean...
you know, maybe if I practiced a lot,
I could walk into the choir room.
Or even prom.
So until then,
just promise me you won't tell anybody.
You're gonna be dancing at prom.
I know it.
I, Becky Faye Jackson,
was born to be Queen, but my crown has been stolen.
Queens don't always have to look the same, you know.
Sometimes they look different.
Sometimes they're shorter.
Or wear glasses.
What are you smiling about, poster-people?
And stop staring at me!
It's not fun to be stared at.
Becky, I understand you're upset,
but this scorched earth reign of terror must come to an end.
First, you declared war on xylophones.
Then, you ransacked the cafeteria line.
But, Coach, I want to be Prom Queen,
just like I just saw in that commercial.
Oh, Becky, commercials aren't real life.
Advertisers are manipulative alcoholics
who use images to play on our emotions.
Haven't you seen Mad Men?
No.
Neither have I.
Becky, let's be realistic:
You just didn't have the votes.
For starters, your posters sent a bit of a mixed message.
But my paintbrush doesn't have spell check, Coach.
And second... and I mean this as a compliment...
you're a bitch, Becky.
With a bad attitude.
And honestly,
with Quinn Fabray in a wheelchair,
the sympathy vote was split.
But here's the goods.
You're coming to prom with me, Becky Jackson,
where I'm making you deputy in charge
of guarding the punch bowl.
Chin up, Jackson.
And please be careful walking
past my brand-new xylophone.
That's the attitude right there, Becky.
♪ The smell of your skin ♪
♪ Lingers on me now ♪
♪ You're probably on your flight ♪
♪ Back to your hometown ♪
♪ I need some shelter ♪
♪ Of my own protection, baby ♪
♪ Be with myself and center ♪
♪ Clarity, peace, serenity ♪
♪ I hope you know ♪
♪ That this has nothing to do with you ♪
♪ It's personal, myself and I ♪
♪ We've got some straightening out to do ♪
♪ And I'm gonna miss you ♪
♪ Like a child misses their blanket ♪
♪ But I've got to get a move on with my life ♪
♪ It's time to be a big girl now ♪
♪ And big girls don't cry ♪
♪ But it's time for me to go home ♪
♪ It's getting late and dark outside ♪
♪ I need to be with myself and center ♪
♪ Clarity, peace, serenity, yeah ♪
♪ I hope you know ♪
♪ That this has nothing to do with you ♪
♪ It's personal, myself and I ♪
♪ We've got some straightening out to do ♪
♪ And I'm gonna miss you ♪
♪ Like a child misses their blanket ♪
♪ But I've got to get a move on with my life ♪
♪ It's time to be a big girl now ♪
♪ And big girls don't cry. ♪
Rehearsing for prom?
'Cause I love that song,
but it's sort of a downer, don't you think?
It's just how I'm feeling right now, okay?
I don't want to watch Finn and Quinn
get crowned the king and queen at my prom.
I don't want to watch him dance with her.
I-I know that she can't
really dance anymore, but...
I'm sorry. You know... you know what I mean.
She's right.
Prom sucks. Yeah.
I don't want to go, either. Well, you have to go.
You're the reigning prom queen.
You have to crown the next one.
As much as I love a good coronation,
I can't risk it.
With this school's
strong and insane tradition
of write-in ballots, I could get
elected prom queen again, all right?
And I know I put on
a brave face last year, but it was humiliating.
And, had I known, I would have worn a full kilt, so...
How do you think I feel
with Brittany's insane ban on hair gel?
It's prom. There's going to be balloons all over the place,
not to mention the taffeta and the silk blends.
The sheer amount of static electricity
in that room is going to be terrifying.
It's crazy. You've never seen my hair
without gel... it's-it's baby-hair fine.
No, it... I'm going to look like Medusa.
It's not funny. I don't want to go.
Well, if we're all going to be
so miserable about it, who says we have to go?
You're right, Kurt.
But I have a better idea.
So Kurt and Blaine and I are throwing
an anti-prom party.
What's an anti-prom party?
It's a party for those of us
who maybe feel a little, you know,
disenfranchised by the actual prom.
And I got us a hotel room at Lima's best hotel,
Red Rooster Express Suite, and everyone's invited.
You're supporting this?
I'm supporting her,
and I'll be there
as soon as I'm done fulfilling my...
obligations.
The mood will be celebratory,
the food will be catered,
the libations will be plentiful,
and the dress code will be creative black tie.
Optional, optional, optional.
And keeping up with the anti-prom theme,
everyone is welcome, and unlike the actual prom,
which ends at 11:00 p.m.,
ours goes until the wee hours of the night.
It's where the fun's at, you guys.
Okay, how is everyone welcome when this is clearly
just a party for you and the two gay Winklevii twins?
Actually, Santana, we've invited
most of McKinley's underclassmen.
I wanted to invite you to our anti-prom party.
Who's going? Me, Kurt...
Boring. Who else?
Well, we just came up with the idea.
I'll think about it.
- I'm in. - But what about
your tradition of trying
to spike Coach Sylvester's punch bowl?
I almost lost my teeth
for it last time. It's impossible.
Plus it's a bummer, always failing... at everything.
Can we just talk about what this really is?
Rachel Berry isn't getting her way,
so she's punishing the rest of us.
Santana, that's not the case at all.
Stop acting like you're fine
and start dealing with your crap.
Look, you choked at your big audition.
I get it.
I'm sorry, but it happens.
And I understand that you're pissed off at the universe,
but imploding on one of the last nights
that we have to spend together
because, basically, you're just not in the mood to dance
is maybe the pettiest thing you have ever done.
So have fun at your "I'm a victim" party,
acting like you're not some selfish, self-centered,
lame-ass wannabe diva from hell,
because me, I'm going to go to my senior prom
with my girlfriend and my friends.
You can't be too pleased by that stunt Rachel's pulling.
I'm not, but I kind of feel bad for her.
She's going through a lot of rough stuff.
Rough stuff?
Did you forget that you're talking
to a girl in a wheelchair?
Yeah, looks good.
We've come full circle.
Yeah, just like old times.
Though, to be clear, there will be no
extracurricular activity this time.
I'm going to Yale, and there are no tire store majors there.
Well, neither are there at the Actors Studio,
where I'm applying.
Oh, my God.
Quinn Fabray...
you're so brave to be doing this.
Thank you.
The atrophy in my leg is a constant reminder
of the slow, withering remnants of my past life.
The toll can, at times, be physically
and emotionally hard,
knowing that I may never walk again.
People like you inspire me.
Your healthy, normal legs are beautiful.
You deserve this.
You've got my vote.
Wow, that was super creepy.
It won't be when we're standing
up on that stage soaking up the applause.
Don't you feel kind of weird using your injury
to get the sympathy vote like that?
Votes are votes, Finn.
Do you want to win or not?
This is awesome.
I actually really love dinosaurs.
Whoa.
Triceratops.
♪ D-I-N-O-S-A ♪
♪ U-R a dinosaur ♪
♪ D-I-N-O-S-A ♪
♪ U-R a dinosaur ♪
♪ An O-L-D M-A-N ♪
♪ You're just an old man ♪
♪ Hitting on me, what? ♪
♪ You need a CAT scan ♪
♪ Yeah, you're pretty old ♪
♪ Not long till you're a senior citizen ♪
♪ And you can strut around with that sexy tank of oxygen ♪
♪ Honey, your toupee is falling to your left side ♪
♪ Get up and go, bro ♪
♪ Oh, wait, you're fossilized, ha ♪
♪ You sit down, buy me a martini ♪
♪ Won't go away, my hips aren't sinking ♪
♪ You say ♪ ♪ "Hey, wanna come with me?" ♪
♪ I'm about to barf, seriously ♪
♪ D-I-N-O-S-A ♪
♪ U-R a dinosaur ♪
♪ D-I-N-O-S-A ♪
♪ U-R a dinosaur ♪
♪ An O-L-D M-A-N ♪
♪ You're just an old man ♪
♪ Hitting on me, what? ♪
♪ You need a CAT scan ♪
♪ Hey, dinosaur ♪
♪ Baby, you're prehistoric ♪
♪ Hey, dinosaur ♪
♪ That's what you are, ha ♪
♪ Hey, carnivore ♪
♪ You want my meat, I know it ♪
♪ Hey, dinosaur ♪
♪ That's what you are, ha... ♪
Hudson Hog,
take a deep, meaningful drink
of Sue Sylvester's Special Prombrosia.
I don't know if it's the sentimental fetus in me talking,
but I think it's my best batch ever.
Nothing but Fruit Juicy Red,
Manhattan Seltzer and seven tablespoons
of Visine,
just so we get out of here on time.
Uh, have you seen Quinn?
I-I want to make sure that I can, uh,
get her and her wheelchair up on stage when she wins.
Well, she had a couple of cups of punch earlier,
so I'd probably start with the little girls' room.
♪ D-I-N-O-S-A ♪
♪ U-R a dinosaur ♪
♪ D-I-N-O-S-A ♪
♪ That's what you are, ha. ♪
Hello.
Hey, Quinn, Quinn, you in here?
You... you can walk?
Yeah.
Isn't it amazing?
You're seeing me take my first steps.
So you-you... you lied to us.
To everybody.
No, I mean, my legs are getting better,
but I wanted it to be a surprise.
You know, for when I walk up there
and... and get my crown.
The crowd will go wild.
I really want this. Yeah.
You may want this,
but Rachel needs me, and... and I picked
you over her.
Do you know how stupid that makes me feel?
You have everything.
You're going to have your crown.
You're going to go to Yale.
Rachel has none of that.
And tonight, thanks to you,
she doesn't even have me. We're a shoo-in.
I need you.
No, you don't need me, okay?
I-I-I thought
going through all that terrible stuff
this year made you cooler,
but no, you're still the same old Quinn.
All that matters is you. Come on, stop!
Please.
Look, it's mandatory for the nominees
to have at least one dance together.
I know you don't understand
how much this means to me, but...
...will you please just stay here for me?
Please.
Oh, my God. All right.
Let the very first annual McKinley High Anti-Prom begin.
Oh, look, there's chocolates on the pillows.
We got room service.
Minibar! Whoo!
Nice!
So, uh, what should we do now?
Duh... play strip poker.
I brought condoms.
Becky, Blaine and I are gay, remember?
Never stopped me before.
Well, I mean, no matter what, it'll be better than prom.
Yeah! Who wants to be in that smelly old gym, anyway?
Prom's a sucker's paradise.
Prom sucks! Let's get wasted! Whoo!
Becky, Becky, we appreciate your enthusiasm,
but will you just keep it down with the shouting?
Keep your big honking nose out of it, Berry!
Oh, snap! Oh snap!
So, I wouldn't mind
watching a little TV.
Um, maybe some Bravo?
Dude, it's a hotel. It's gotta be Skinemax.
We could put on a fashion show!
Yeah! Let's go all Sound of Music
and make some old-timey couture
out of the drapes and bedsheets, huh? Too gay!
I second that.
Well, I'd love
to show you guys my prom dress.
I wouldn't want it to go completely to waste.
It's in my car. I can go get it.
Worst anti-prom ever!
♪ It's been said and done ♪
♪ Every beautiful thought's been already sung ♪
♪ And I guess right now here's another one ♪
♪ So your melody will play on and on ♪
♪ With the best of 'em ♪
First time we danced together
like this was at last year's prom.
I remember.
And remember when I told you we were
gonna get back together
and you told me I was crazy? Crazy.
That's 'cause you are.
Yeah, but you kind of love it.
♪ And I want you to know, baby ♪
♪ I, I love you like a love song, baby ♪
Looks like everyone's happy tonight.
♪ I, I love you like a love song, baby ♪
♪ And I keep hitting repeat- peat, peat, peat, peat, peat ♪
♪ I, I love you like a love song, baby ♪
♪ I, I love you like a long song, baby ♪
♪ And I keep hitting repeat- peat, peat, peat, peat, peat ♪
♪ Constantly, girl, you play ♪
♪ Through my mind like a symphony ♪
♪ There's no way to describe what you do to me ♪
♪ You just do me ♪
♪ What you do ♪
♪ And it feels like I've been rescued ♪ ♪ Rescued ♪
♪ I've been set free ♪ ♪ Set free ♪
♪ I am hypnotized by destiny ♪ ♪ Destiny ♪
♪ You are magical, lyrical, beautiful ♪
♪ You are, and I want you to know, baby ♪
♪ I, I love you like a love song, baby ♪
Just one dance. Come and finish it with me?
Yeah, I will... as soon as you stand up
and show everybody how much you deserve this,
how much you deserve to be Prom Queen
Are you really doing this right now?
What, making you walk?
Make you stand up and show everybody how much of
a crazy liar you are? Yeah.
Come on. Stand up! What's going on, dude?
Did you know that she could walk, too? You must have
with all that physical therapy you've been giving.
Hey, just finish the dance with me!
Stand the hell up! Come on!
What is wrong with you?!
Hey, hey, hey! You forcing me
to eject you from yet another prom, Hudson?
Not this time, Coach.
Good idea, Frumps.
What are you looking at, Jar-Jar Binks?
Touch those peanut M&M's, and I will end you.
This is a repeat. It's the one with
the passive-aggressive lesbian and the doggy care.
I wish Tabatha would take over this anti-prom.
Gosh, this sucks.
Yeah, well...
If you wanted to go to the prom,
I would have gone with you.
I am not going
to give into Brittany's insane ban on hair gel.
Freedom to use hair care products?
It's in the Bill of Rights.
Didn't the founding fathers all wear wigs?
You haven't seen me
without an enormous amount of gel in my hair.
It's, it's really bad.
Finally,
the room service is here. I want my shrimp cocktail!
Hey, Becky.
Where's Rachel?
She's been in the bathroom for 45 minutes.
I'm guessing the runs.
All right, let's let
the anti-prom fashion extravaganza begin.
Hi.
What are you doing here?
Well, I'll keep it simple.
I love you. You're beautiful.
Prom sucks without you.
Prom sucks without all of you, guys.
This is the last t time
we're gonna get to be together like this.
I want to dance with my fiancé, dance with my friends.
Well, I'll just pretend to be an iceculpture
if Brittany sees me, and then she'll just pass me by.
So, you guys gonna come?
Not until I get my shrimp cocktail.
I'm good. And you guys go ahead.
Come on, dude. You're my wingman.
I'll go next year.
Come.
Are you ready for strip poker, Puckerman?
Socks count as one item.
I'm so glad you guys came.
Better late than never, right?
Come on. Let's dance.
♪ You're insecure, don't know what for ♪
No, sorry, Blaine.
I said no hair gel, remember?
I can totally smell it.
Let's go!
You can do this.
♪ The way that you are is enough ♪
♪ Everyone else in the room can see it ♪
♪ Everyone else but you ♪
♪ Baby, you light up my world like nobody else ♪
♪ The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed ♪
♪ But when you smile at the ground it ain't hard to tell ♪
♪ You don't know, oh-oh ♪
♪ You don't know you're beautiful ♪
♪ If only you saw what I can see ♪
♪ You'll understand why I want you so desperately ♪
♪ Right now I'm looking at you ♪
♪ And I can't believe you don't know, oh-oh ♪
♪ You don't know you're beautiful, oh-oh ♪
♪ That's what makes you beautiful ♪
♪ Na, na-na-na, na-na-na, na, na ♪
♪ Na, na-na-na, na-na ♪
♪ Baby, you light up my world like nobody else ♪
♪ The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed ♪
♪ But when you smile at the ground it ain't hard to tell ♪
♪ You don't know you're beautiful ♪
♪ You light up my world like nobody else ♪
♪ The way you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed ♪
♪ But when you smile at the ground, it ain't hard to tell ♪
♪ You don't know, oh-oh, you don't know you're beautiful ♪
♪ If only you saw what I can see ♪
♪ You'll understand why I want you so desperately ♪
♪ Right now I'm looking at you and I can't believe ♪
♪ You don't know, oh-oh ♪
♪ You don't know you're beautiful, oh-oh ♪
♪ That's what makes you beautiful. ♪
Suck on these, Puckerman.
Trip aces.
Crap. I'm getting sharked.
Where'd you learn to play?
In the joint.
Well, I'm one losing hand away
from an extremely awkward situation,
so would you mind laying off a little bit?
I can't. I'm too pissed off. Why?
'Cause I didn't get nominated for prom queen
like that girl in the commercial.
Coach Sue said I couldn't get the votes.
You really wanted that crown, huh?
More than anything.
It hurts, Puck.
Becky Jackson...
I'm putting some clothes on 'cause I have an idea.
Really?
Yeah, check it out.
We still haven't crowned a king
and queen for the anti-prom, have we?
No, we haven't.
I'm gonna bust out my knife.
If you ask me, I think
the anti-prom's the most important prom of all.
First, we need a king.
Nice.
And then now, we need a queen. Hmm...
I hope I get it.
Becky Jackson...
I crown you the Queen of the anti-prom.
Take a look.
Oh, my gosh!
I did it.
I'm so happy.
Your Highness, what do you say we get out of here?
Sure.
My prince.
Hey, I got your text.
You have three minutes.
The voting has started, and I need
to get out there and press the flesh.
Look, I owe you an apology.
I-I found out that you and Finn
were campaigning together,
and I kind of freaked out.
I got really jealous and irrational,
I just, I should have been supportive.
Well, since I had no idea that was going on,
it's pretty easy to forgive you.
So I'm glad we cleared this up.
Wait. Do you not understand
what you mean to me?
When we first met,
you were everything I wanted to be:
You were beautiful and popular,
and you had Finn.
How the mighty have fallen.
No, you don't understand.
I still see you the same way, okay?
That's why I got so crazy.
Because I wasn't seeing the new Quinn.
The still-beautiful,
but humbled and inspiring Quinn.
I, I've lost so much over these past few weeks.
And I honestly don't know
what the hell I'm gonna do to do with my life.
But when I look back on my high school career
the one thing, the one accomplishment that I'm gonna be
so proud of is that I found a way to be your friend.
So I'm apologizing to my friend.
And I also want you to know that
I voted for you for Prom Queen.
And I really think you deserve it.
Stop making out with Berry and
get to the Spanish room, Quinn.
It's time to count the votes and declare me the winner.
Right.
Bye. Good luck.
Drop that ladle, Cohen-Chang!
Ooh, I'm onto you, lady.
You're trying to spike my punch!
No, I'm not. I'm just thirsty.
I'm dehydrated from all the crying.
Yeah, right.
That dress is hideous.
Becky Faye Jackson, you've done it!
You're at senior prom with a crown on your head,
and a hot piece of booty on your arm.
And for once in my life,
I don't mind everybody staring at me.
Game on, beautiful.
Born for this, Puckerman.
Becky, I don't care which dope we crown here tonight,
you are truly the queen of this joint.
Thanks, Coach!
Oh, my God!
Is that a sniper in the rafters?
Oh, I knew I should've done another security sweep.
I don't see anything.
Use your infrared glasses, Coach.
Good idea, Becky.
I don't see anything.
Dance with me, Puckerman?
Thank you for making my dream come true, my queen.
My count for king is the same as yours.
I don't get it.
How could Brittany have only gotten four votes?
This Dino Prom theme was a smash.
Well, maybe it has something to do with the fact
that she's a girl.
Well, screw this.
I don't want to be queen if Britt isn't king.
Well, good, because my count for queen was the same as yours.
I won by one vote.
I won.
It's everything I've ever wanted
and I don't feel any different.
Cool.
I mean, I guess you deserve to win, right?
What with being a crip and all.
You know, we really have had the dream high school careers.
Mega-popular, doing whatever we wanted.
Whoever we wanted.
You know, I'm really not surprised
that you and I were the top two candidates.
Yeah.
Well, you know, it would be boring if we weren't so awesome.
Don't you want to leave this place having made a difference?
Oh, my dear God.
Don't make fun of the new kid
with the bad 'fro. It's hair-bullying.
That's not a new kid. That's Blaine without hair gel.
Is it really that bad?
Yeah, you're Mr. Broccoli Head. It's not that bad.
Yeah, it is. It's really bad.
And you made your point.
I abuse my power as president... but to help save the prom,
and to keep people from turning to stone when they look at you,
I'll give you special permission to wear hair gel, immediately.
Quiet, please, children.
I'll be right back.
Thank you, thank you.
Don't you dare.
I love finally getting to see the real you.
The man without the product.
And I want everyone here to know just how proud I am
of my brave, handsome, bushy-haired boyfriend.
Come on, Barrette.
First I have an announcement to make:
There are reptiles living in McKinley toilets no more.
The family of snakes has been safely removed to the zoo,
and they can life out their lives in the toilets there.
And now, this year's Prom Court:
Nominees for the Prom King are:
Finn Hudson...
Rick "The Stick" Nelson...
I love you, man!
And President Brittany S. Pierce.
The nominees for Prom Queen:
Missy Gunderson...
Santana Lopez...
(applause, whoopin
...and Miss Quinn Fabray.
I would like to invite last year's queen,
sassy male student Kurt Hummel,
to crown this year's winners.
And...
this year's Prom King is...
Hmm...
Mr. Finn Hudson.
Go, Finn!
And the winner for Prom Queen is...
Students, for the second year in a row, we have prom anarchy.
Receiving the majority of write-in votes,
I would like to welcome on the stage...
Miss Rachel Berry.
Smile and breathe.
McKinley Titans, bow down to your new leaders!
And now...
first dance of this year's Senior King and Queen!
♪ Watching every motion in my foolish lover's game... ♪
Is this some kind of joke or something?
I mean, like Kurt last year,
is someone going to throw pig's blood on me next,
like in Carrie?
Look at me.
You're sexy, you're beautiful,
you're an inspiration to every single person in this room,
just like you are to me.
From where you began, to where you are now...
...you're amazing.
♪ Watching in slow-motion as you turn around and say ♪
♪ You take my breath away ♪
♪ Take my breath away ♪
Hey, are you really crying?
I just... don't want it to end.
Prom night?
Everything.
This whole year.
I just wish it could go on forever.
♪ You take my breath away ♪
♪ Watching every motion in this foolish lover's game ♪
♪ Haunted by the notion ♪
♪ Somewhere there's a love in flames... ♪
Praise!
It's a prom miracle.
♪ Turning and returning to some secret place inside... ♪
♪ Watching in slow-motion as you turn my way ♪
♪ And say ♪
♪ You take my breath away ♪
♪ My love ♪
♪ Take my breath away, oh... ♪
♪ Away ♪
♪ Take my breath away... ♪
Never in a million years would I have thought
that someone like me would win Prom Queen.
But if my friends believe in me enough to see me this way, then...
I don't know, maybe anything's possible.
♪ Away ♪
♪ Take my breath away ♪
♪ My love ♪
♪ Take my breath away... ♪