1 00:00:01,100 --> 00:00:01,778 (bell rings) Shalom, blogosphere. 2 00:00:01,863 --> 00:00:03,397 Jacob Ben Israel here at McKinley High. 3 00:00:03,481 --> 00:00:05,949 "Sudden Death" big stakes senior year-- 4 00:00:06,017 --> 00:00:09,686 who will succeed and who will fail? 5 00:00:09,737 --> 00:00:11,905 Finn Hudson, mediocre quarterback, 6 00:00:11,990 --> 00:00:13,824 mediocre Glee Club lead. 7 00:00:13,875 --> 00:00:16,026 What do you want to be when you grow up? 8 00:00:16,077 --> 00:00:18,045 Me? Uh... 9 00:00:18,129 --> 00:00:19,997 Yeah, I have plans. 10 00:00:20,048 --> 00:00:21,248 (bell ringing) Um... 11 00:00:21,332 --> 00:00:22,966 My mom still hasn't decided 12 00:00:23,034 --> 00:00:24,718 if I'm going to Harvard or Stanford yet. 13 00:00:24,802 --> 00:00:26,219 And where are you applying? 14 00:00:26,304 --> 00:00:27,871 I'm not. I'm only a junior. 15 00:00:27,922 --> 00:00:29,306 Senior, junior, junior. 16 00:00:29,373 --> 00:00:30,424 Hello. 17 00:00:30,508 --> 00:00:32,426 Huh. I thought you were a senior. 18 00:00:32,510 --> 00:00:33,977 Optical illusion. 19 00:00:34,045 --> 00:00:36,063 The chair adds a year. 20 00:00:36,147 --> 00:00:37,597 Uh... 21 00:00:37,682 --> 00:00:40,567 (singing scales): ♪ Me, me, me, me, me, me, you ♪ 22 00:00:40,652 --> 00:00:42,319 ♪ Me, me, me, me, me, me... ♪ 23 00:00:42,386 --> 00:00:43,487 I'm glad you asked. 24 00:00:43,554 --> 00:00:44,821 This year we'll both be applying 25 00:00:44,889 --> 00:00:46,356 to a New York-based performing arts school-- 26 00:00:46,407 --> 00:00:47,607 (sneezes) Juilliard. 27 00:00:47,692 --> 00:00:48,859 We'll get an eclectic little apartment 28 00:00:48,910 --> 00:00:50,110 on the Lower East Side... 29 00:00:50,194 --> 00:00:51,495 Think Bette and Barbara Hershey in Beaches, 30 00:00:51,562 --> 00:00:52,996 pre-cardiomyopathy. 31 00:00:53,064 --> 00:00:54,414 I'll originate a role in a new Sondheim musical; 32 00:00:54,499 --> 00:00:56,667 Tony by 25. Married by 3 33 00:00:56,734 --> 00:00:58,085 ♪ Leg-a-lly! ♪ Broadway, Lincoln Center, 34 00:00:58,169 --> 00:01:00,537 West End, a tasteful HBO miniseries. 35 00:01:00,588 --> 00:01:02,422 It's all right here in my planner, you see? 36 00:01:02,507 --> 00:01:04,741 Twitter says you're officially dating Sam Evans, 37 00:01:04,792 --> 00:01:08,095 AKA Trouty Mouth, AKA Hobo McBieber. 38 00:01:08,179 --> 00:01:09,680 Honey, that is so June. 39 00:01:09,747 --> 00:01:12,215 Yeah, Sam and I dated, but his dad got a job out of state. 40 00:01:12,266 --> 00:01:14,217 But I'm gonna give you an exclusive: Ooh. 41 00:01:14,268 --> 00:01:16,136 There's a new man in Mercedes' life now, 42 00:01:16,220 --> 00:01:17,854 and he's my future plans. 43 00:01:17,922 --> 00:01:19,606 I'm not your only your future plans, baby. 44 00:01:19,691 --> 00:01:21,091 You're gonna be a star, 45 00:01:21,142 --> 00:01:23,060 and when you graduate and win that first Grammy, 46 00:01:23,111 --> 00:01:24,945 we're gonna make beautiful cocoa babies. 47 00:01:25,029 --> 00:01:28,315 Ooh, baby, how you talk. 48 00:01:28,399 --> 00:01:30,233 Senior year is all about being the Cheerios! top 'ho 49 00:01:30,284 --> 00:01:32,119 and modeling my fierceness 50 00:01:32,203 --> 00:01:34,821 after my numero uno Latina: Paula Abdul. 51 00:01:34,906 --> 00:01:36,573 Paula Abdul is an Arab. 52 00:01:36,624 --> 00:01:38,325 Hey, has anyone seen Quinn Fabray? 53 00:01:38,409 --> 00:01:39,626 Hi. Hi. 54 00:01:39,711 --> 00:01:41,628 Ooh, Brittany, what are your plans for the future? 55 00:01:41,713 --> 00:01:43,046 Wait. 56 00:01:43,114 --> 00:01:46,116 Are you working on a time machine, too? 57 00:01:46,167 --> 00:01:48,385 I'm really excited about this year. 58 00:01:48,452 --> 00:01:51,121 Okay... cool. 59 00:01:51,172 --> 00:01:53,340 FINN: The truth is, I have no idea what I'm doing. 60 00:01:53,424 --> 00:01:55,258 I look around, and everyone knows where they're headed 61 00:01:55,309 --> 00:01:56,727 or at least what they want. 62 00:01:56,794 --> 00:01:58,311 I'm lost. 63 00:01:58,396 --> 00:02:00,847 It's like I can't even remember who I am anymore. 64 00:02:00,932 --> 00:02:02,015 HOCKEY PLAYER: Hey! 65 00:02:03,851 --> 00:02:05,736 Taste the rainbow, glee-yatch! 66 00:02:05,803 --> 00:02:06,770 (mocking laughter) 67 00:02:06,821 --> 00:02:08,472 Now I remember. 68 00:02:09,332 --> 00:02:12,984 Synced By YesCool www.addic7ed.com 69 00:02:12,660 --> 00:02:15,112 (alarm stops) 70 00:02:15,163 --> 00:02:17,414 Rise and shine, sleepyhead. 71 00:02:17,481 --> 00:02:18,865 (both giggling) 72 00:02:18,950 --> 00:02:20,867 Guess who woke up right before I did? 73 00:02:20,952 --> 00:02:22,669 I haven't brushed yet. 74 00:02:38,553 --> 00:02:40,554 (bell ringing) 75 00:02:40,638 --> 00:02:42,606 Mr. Shue, why are all of our trophies 76 00:02:42,673 --> 00:02:44,391 in the middle of the room? 77 00:02:44,475 --> 00:02:46,610 I was sure that our Nationals trophy would grow during the summer. 78 00:02:46,677 --> 00:02:48,228 I want this image burned into your mind. 79 00:02:48,312 --> 00:02:49,362 This is what the difference 80 00:02:49,447 --> 00:02:50,614 between first 81 00:02:50,681 --> 00:02:52,199 and 12th place looks like. 82 00:02:52,283 --> 00:02:54,117 It's also what it feels like. 83 00:02:54,185 --> 00:02:56,403 Are you planning on bumming us out all year long? No. 84 00:02:56,487 --> 00:02:57,704 I'm planning on pushing you harder 85 00:02:57,789 --> 00:02:58,955 than you've ever been pushed. 86 00:02:59,023 --> 00:03:01,357 We made it to Nationals last year. 87 00:03:01,409 --> 00:03:03,526 This year, I'm not going to let anything or anyone 88 00:03:03,578 --> 00:03:06,296 stop us from winning it all; I let you down last year. 89 00:03:06,363 --> 00:03:09,199 I lost focus, let some Broadway pipe dream get in the way. 90 00:03:09,250 --> 00:03:11,201 And we're really sorry that the guy who replaced you 91 00:03:11,252 --> 00:03:12,869 in April Rhodes' musical won the Tony. 92 00:03:12,920 --> 00:03:14,370 I mean, I can only imagine your regret. 93 00:03:14,422 --> 00:03:16,056 MERCEDES: Yeah, you know what I regret? 94 00:03:16,140 --> 00:03:18,842 Being the laughingstock of the show choir world. 95 00:03:18,893 --> 00:03:20,477 And that's saying something. 96 00:03:20,544 --> 00:03:21,895 Mercedes has a point. 97 00:03:21,979 --> 00:03:23,880 Finn and Rachel's "The Kiss That Missed" 98 00:03:23,931 --> 00:03:25,315 already has 20,000 views on YouTube, 99 00:03:25,382 --> 00:03:27,050 and the comments section 100 00:03:27,101 --> 00:03:29,069 is just full of pithy banter like 101 00:03:29,153 --> 00:03:31,438 "Why is that T Rex eating the Jew?" 102 00:03:31,522 --> 00:03:34,074 How many times do we have to apologize? Yeah. No more apologies. 103 00:03:34,158 --> 00:03:35,075 The school hates us even more now. 104 00:03:35,159 --> 00:03:36,493 Which is why we have to work 105 00:03:36,560 --> 00:03:38,161 even harder this year to recruit new members. 106 00:03:38,229 --> 00:03:39,329 We're three men down. 107 00:03:39,396 --> 00:03:40,614 Yeah, only because Puckerman 108 00:03:40,698 --> 00:03:42,398 couldn't convince Zizes to stay. 109 00:03:42,450 --> 00:03:44,951 What we had was hot, but after the debacle of Nationals, 110 00:03:45,036 --> 00:03:46,419 the Glee Club is not, 111 00:03:46,504 --> 00:03:48,672 and my cool factor can't withstand it, 112 00:03:48,739 --> 00:03:50,507 all right? My rep is in free fall. 113 00:03:50,574 --> 00:03:52,843 Oh, don't be sad. 114 00:03:52,910 --> 00:03:54,427 We'll always have Subway. 115 00:03:54,512 --> 00:03:55,962 PUCK: She's the one that got away-- 116 00:03:56,047 --> 00:03:59,182 really, really slowly. 117 00:03:59,250 --> 00:04:00,650 Where's Quinn? ARTIE: MIA. 118 00:04:00,718 --> 00:04:02,219 No one's heard from her. 119 00:04:02,270 --> 00:04:03,603 It's sad; I miss her. 120 00:04:03,688 --> 00:04:05,055 No one is going to join, Mr. Shue. 121 00:04:05,106 --> 00:04:06,273 They will. 122 00:04:06,357 --> 00:04:07,757 All they need is a little inspiration-- 123 00:04:07,808 --> 00:04:09,359 and I happen to have some, 124 00:04:09,426 --> 00:04:10,894 courtesy of Al Motta of Motta's Pianos. 125 00:04:10,945 --> 00:04:12,095 Bring 'em in, guys! 126 00:04:12,146 --> 00:04:14,397 WILL: You guys are going to love this. 127 00:04:14,448 --> 00:04:15,949 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 128 00:04:16,033 --> 00:04:17,600 Okay, if there are purple pianos 129 00:04:17,652 --> 00:04:20,103 involved in this, I am on board. 130 00:04:20,154 --> 00:04:23,439 These pianos were repossessed from foreclosed homes. 131 00:04:23,491 --> 00:04:25,825 They're cast-offs, just like all of us. 132 00:04:25,910 --> 00:04:28,678 Used, in need of repairs. 133 00:04:28,746 --> 00:04:30,747 But they're still capable of making beautiful music. 134 00:04:30,798 --> 00:04:33,216 WILL: Right. So Mr. Motta, as a lover of the arts, 135 00:04:33,284 --> 00:04:35,719 agreed to donate them to Glee. 136 00:04:35,786 --> 00:04:37,304 I fixed them up, 137 00:04:37,388 --> 00:04:38,755 painted them purple, 138 00:04:38,806 --> 00:04:40,724 and The Purple Piano Project was born. 139 00:04:40,791 --> 00:04:43,977 Now, I'm going to be placing these grapey uprights randomly 140 00:04:44,061 --> 00:04:45,929 throughout the school, and whenever you see one, 141 00:04:45,980 --> 00:04:47,314 no matter what you're doing, 142 00:04:47,398 --> 00:04:49,149 I want you to sing a song. 143 00:04:49,233 --> 00:04:50,901 Now, use this assignment to attract kids 144 00:04:50,968 --> 00:04:52,769 who are just like you-- 145 00:04:52,820 --> 00:04:55,021 kids who can't keep the music inside. 146 00:04:55,106 --> 00:04:56,773 Those are the kinds of additions 147 00:04:56,824 --> 00:04:59,075 that we need to win it all this year. 148 00:04:59,143 --> 00:05:00,310 (sighs) Now, for many of you, 149 00:05:00,361 --> 00:05:02,645 this is your last year. 150 00:05:02,697 --> 00:05:04,080 Let's make it special. 151 00:05:04,148 --> 00:05:05,365 (bell ringing) 152 00:05:05,449 --> 00:05:07,968 We have an important announcement to make. 153 00:05:08,035 --> 00:05:09,485 I thought this day might come. 154 00:05:09,537 --> 00:05:11,254 Really, this is the only dating combination 155 00:05:11,322 --> 00:05:12,839 that the Glee Club hasn't tried. 156 00:05:12,924 --> 00:05:14,090 We're not dating. 157 00:05:14,158 --> 00:05:16,659 Kurt and I will be auditioning for Juilliard, 158 00:05:16,711 --> 00:05:18,511 the nation's premiere performing arts school. 159 00:05:18,596 --> 00:05:20,180 That's a very good plan, guys. 160 00:05:20,264 --> 00:05:21,097 It's fabulous. 161 00:05:21,165 --> 00:05:22,849 Except Juilliard doesn't have 162 00:05:22,934 --> 00:05:24,601 a musical theatre department. 163 00:05:26,771 --> 00:05:28,305 Wait, what? 164 00:05:28,356 --> 00:05:30,673 Have you guys thought about somewhere closer to home? 165 00:05:30,725 --> 00:05:33,526 Kent State has a wonderful musical theatre program 166 00:05:33,611 --> 00:05:35,845 and a macabre backstory, so if you're having a bad day 167 00:05:35,896 --> 00:05:38,481 or if you don't get the lead in a musical, you can say 168 00:05:38,532 --> 00:05:40,700 to yourselves, "You know what? Things really could be worse." 169 00:05:40,785 --> 00:05:43,119 No... No, thank you. 170 00:05:43,187 --> 00:05:45,455 No one ever became a star by playing it safe. 171 00:05:45,522 --> 00:05:46,990 We're going to New York. 172 00:05:47,041 --> 00:05:50,377 We are. I think I have the school for you. 173 00:05:50,461 --> 00:05:51,861 (drawer opens, then closes) 174 00:05:54,498 --> 00:05:55,999 NYADA? 175 00:05:56,050 --> 00:05:57,634 New York Academy for the Dramatic Arts. 176 00:05:57,701 --> 00:05:59,052 US News and World Report 177 00:05:59,136 --> 00:06:00,887 ranked them the number one college in the nation 178 00:06:00,972 --> 00:06:02,055 for musical theatre. 179 00:06:02,139 --> 00:06:03,306 It's really competitive, 180 00:06:03,374 --> 00:06:05,392 They only take about 20 students a year, 181 00:06:05,476 --> 00:06:08,228 but they do a regular mixer for prospective students, 182 00:06:08,312 --> 00:06:10,397 and this year, the Midwest's top talent 183 00:06:10,481 --> 00:06:12,548 is rubbing elbows at the Dayton Doubletree on Thursday night. 184 00:06:12,600 --> 00:06:15,652 You could go and check out the competish! 185 00:06:15,719 --> 00:06:17,937 Yay! Yay, college! 186 00:06:18,022 --> 00:06:19,155 (bell rings) 187 00:06:19,223 --> 00:06:21,724 The poll numbers are in, Coach. 188 00:06:21,776 --> 00:06:22,942 Close the door. 189 00:06:23,027 --> 00:06:24,694 Becky, the special election 190 00:06:24,745 --> 00:06:28,248 to fill Ken "Heart Attack" Weigand's congressional seat 191 00:06:28,332 --> 00:06:33,837 is in two months, and I am in ninth place at six percent, 192 00:06:33,904 --> 00:06:35,755 well behind "Undecided," 193 00:06:35,840 --> 00:06:37,407 that rapist running from prison, 194 00:06:37,458 --> 00:06:39,909 and "I don't care, please don't call me during dinner." 195 00:06:39,960 --> 00:06:43,630 I thought the people wanted a candidate who was for something. 196 00:06:43,714 --> 00:06:46,216 That's why I took that pro-deportation stance. 197 00:06:46,267 --> 00:06:48,084 But the people are angry. 198 00:06:48,135 --> 00:06:49,886 They want a candidate 199 00:06:49,937 --> 00:06:52,022 who's against something. 200 00:06:52,089 --> 00:06:54,424 What about toast? 201 00:06:54,475 --> 00:06:56,526 Bread's already been baked. 202 00:06:56,593 --> 00:06:59,062 I don't get why you need to cook it again. 203 00:06:59,113 --> 00:07:02,432 Tsk. Oh, Becky, your twisted genius excites me. 204 00:07:02,483 --> 00:07:05,652 That said, I'm on the precipice of doom. 205 00:07:05,736 --> 00:07:09,489 I need to find something everyone hates. 206 00:07:09,573 --> 00:07:11,157 (sighs) 207 00:07:11,242 --> 00:07:12,826 (piano playing "Chopsticks" in distance) 208 00:07:16,464 --> 00:07:18,331 ("Chopsticks" playing loudly) 209 00:07:18,416 --> 00:07:19,666 (slamming down keyboard lid) 210 00:07:21,785 --> 00:07:23,336 (cutters snipping) 211 00:07:23,421 --> 00:07:24,721 (strings clattering to floor) 212 00:07:24,788 --> 00:07:26,256 Oh, I'm sorry. 213 00:07:26,307 --> 00:07:28,641 I just realized that song might be the national anthem 214 00:07:28,726 --> 00:07:30,343 from whatever country you're from. 215 00:07:30,428 --> 00:07:32,095 That's really offensive. 216 00:07:32,146 --> 00:07:36,399 You know, I was really humbled when your Glee Club 217 00:07:36,467 --> 00:07:40,186 made my sister's funeral so very touching! 218 00:07:40,271 --> 00:07:44,190 In fact, I was so moved that I have spent the entire year 219 00:07:44,275 --> 00:07:47,444 being nothing but kind to you people. 220 00:07:47,495 --> 00:07:48,995 Today's only the second day of school. 221 00:07:49,080 --> 00:07:52,198 You have no right to disturb the learning environment 222 00:07:52,283 --> 00:07:55,285 of this school by playing your jangly national anthem 223 00:07:55,336 --> 00:07:56,652 on Liberace's piano. 224 00:07:59,840 --> 00:08:01,157 Thank you. 225 00:08:01,208 --> 00:08:02,492 You're welcome. 226 00:08:02,543 --> 00:08:04,344 I have no idea who you are. 227 00:08:04,428 --> 00:08:05,762 I'm Nancy Bletheim. 228 00:08:05,829 --> 00:08:07,380 I teach geometry. 229 00:08:07,465 --> 00:08:09,048 I've been teaching here for 42 years. 230 00:08:09,133 --> 00:08:10,433 So awkward. 231 00:08:10,501 --> 00:08:11,718 Those artsy kids, they think 232 00:08:11,802 --> 00:08:13,269 they can get away with anything. 233 00:08:13,337 --> 00:08:15,105 People who call themselves "artists" 234 00:08:15,172 --> 00:08:17,023 think the rules don't apply to them. 235 00:08:17,108 --> 00:08:18,391 It's so arrogant. 236 00:08:18,476 --> 00:08:20,360 Bless you, Sue Sylvester. 237 00:08:20,444 --> 00:08:21,611 You got my vote. 238 00:08:27,151 --> 00:08:28,518 You're quiet. 239 00:08:28,569 --> 00:08:30,403 No. I'm being passive-aggressive. 240 00:08:30,488 --> 00:08:32,522 You promised that by the first day of school, 241 00:08:32,573 --> 00:08:33,856 you'd make a decision. 242 00:08:33,908 --> 00:08:37,860 And yet, there you sit, cute as ever, 243 00:08:37,912 --> 00:08:39,295 but still in your Warblers blazer. 244 00:08:39,363 --> 00:08:41,080 I can't just bail on the Warblers. 245 00:08:41,165 --> 00:08:42,132 Those guys are my friends. 246 00:08:42,199 --> 00:08:43,133 Okay, all right, fine. 247 00:08:43,200 --> 00:08:44,551 One final sales pitch, 248 00:08:44,635 --> 00:08:46,085 and then we can talk about making over Nancy Grace. 249 00:08:46,170 --> 00:08:47,086 Okay. 250 00:08:47,171 --> 00:08:49,389 If you stay at Dalton, 251 00:08:49,473 --> 00:08:52,809 you and I are competitors. 252 00:08:52,876 --> 00:08:53,626 That's true. 253 00:08:53,694 --> 00:08:55,845 And I'm just not sure 254 00:08:55,896 --> 00:08:58,181 that our budding love can survive that. 255 00:08:58,232 --> 00:08:59,382 Let me get this straight. 256 00:08:59,433 --> 00:09:01,651 I have to transfer 257 00:09:01,718 --> 00:09:03,436 because you're just afraid that 258 00:09:03,521 --> 00:09:05,271 I'm going to beat you at Sectionals? 259 00:09:05,356 --> 00:09:07,357 No, I'm afraid that I'm going to beat you. Ooh, ooh, yeah. 260 00:09:07,408 --> 00:09:10,160 And I know what that does to you when I win. 261 00:09:10,227 --> 00:09:12,061 (laughing) 262 00:09:12,112 --> 00:09:13,830 Look, I mean, honestly, I-I just... 263 00:09:13,898 --> 00:09:15,999 I just want to see you more. 264 00:09:16,066 --> 00:09:18,168 Yeah, I want my senior year to be magic, 265 00:09:18,235 --> 00:09:20,170 and the only way that's gonna happen 266 00:09:20,237 --> 00:09:23,506 is if I get to spend every minute of every day with you. 267 00:09:29,380 --> 00:09:30,964 (bell rings) 268 00:09:31,048 --> 00:09:33,850 QUINN: Senior year, and I've finally found myself. 269 00:09:33,917 --> 00:09:36,302 I'm not sure what the tipping point was-- 270 00:09:36,387 --> 00:09:37,470 dyeing my hair, 271 00:09:37,555 --> 00:09:39,606 the nose ring, 272 00:09:39,690 --> 00:09:41,641 my ironic tattoo of Ryan Seacrest-- 273 00:09:41,725 --> 00:09:45,528 but one thing I know, I'm never going back. 274 00:09:45,596 --> 00:09:48,097 Quinn, look, this is our senior year, and, frankly, 275 00:09:48,148 --> 00:09:50,149 being on the Cheerios! isn't the same without you. 276 00:09:50,234 --> 00:09:53,453 You guys are such suckers for going back to Coach Sylvester. 277 00:09:53,537 --> 00:09:56,289 Come on, screw her. This is for us. 278 00:09:56,373 --> 00:09:58,441 We could win two national championships this year. 279 00:09:58,492 --> 00:10:00,093 We joined the Cheerios! together, 280 00:10:00,160 --> 00:10:01,895 we joined Glee Club together, 281 00:10:01,962 --> 00:10:03,530 we all slept with Puckerman the same year. 282 00:10:03,597 --> 00:10:05,131 Mm-hmm. We're like besties for life. 283 00:10:05,199 --> 00:10:06,900 Yeah. Come on, Quinn. 284 00:10:06,967 --> 00:10:09,068 You know, we used to be like the Three Musketeers, 285 00:10:09,136 --> 00:10:11,704 and now Santana and I are like Almond Joy, 286 00:10:11,772 --> 00:10:14,107 and you're like a Jolly Rancher that fell in the ashtray. 287 00:10:14,174 --> 00:10:16,342 You guys never understood the pressure I was under. 288 00:10:16,410 --> 00:10:17,577 It sucked. 289 00:10:17,645 --> 00:10:19,112 I'm not interested in the boys 290 00:10:19,179 --> 00:10:21,681 or the makeup or the polyester outfits. 291 00:10:21,749 --> 00:10:24,517 Look, I've got a bar of soap and a bottle of peroxide 292 00:10:24,585 --> 00:10:27,353 with your name on it in my locker. 293 00:10:27,421 --> 00:10:30,757 Come on, Quinn, you can't break up the unholy trinity. 294 00:10:30,824 --> 00:10:32,058 People grow apart. 295 00:10:32,126 --> 00:10:34,260 Deal with it. 296 00:10:34,328 --> 00:10:38,197 I've got new friends now, and they accept me for who I am. 297 00:10:39,700 --> 00:10:41,584 QUINN: We call ourselves "The Skanks." 298 00:10:41,652 --> 00:10:42,452 I'm Sheila. 299 00:10:42,519 --> 00:10:43,419 I'm Ronnie. 300 00:10:43,487 --> 00:10:44,921 They call me "The Mack" 301 00:10:44,989 --> 00:10:47,056 because I like to make out with truckers at the rest stop. 302 00:10:47,124 --> 00:10:48,458 It's kind of a double meaning thing. 303 00:10:48,525 --> 00:10:49,892 I once ate cat poo. 304 00:10:52,563 --> 00:10:54,597 RACHEL: Hey, Quinn. 305 00:10:54,665 --> 00:10:56,266 Hello... Skanks. 306 00:10:57,534 --> 00:10:59,402 Your friend stinks of soap, Quinn. 307 00:11:00,971 --> 00:11:03,439 We were friends once. 308 00:11:03,507 --> 00:11:04,707 Okay? And maybe when you cut off 309 00:11:04,775 --> 00:11:06,209 all your hair last year and thought it 310 00:11:06,277 --> 00:11:07,710 would solve all your problems, I should have spoken up. 311 00:11:07,778 --> 00:11:09,012 Maybe when you dropped out 312 00:11:09,079 --> 00:11:10,546 of society this summer and started dating 313 00:11:10,614 --> 00:11:12,081 that 40-year-old skateboarder, I should have said... 314 00:11:12,149 --> 00:11:13,816 I'm not coming back to Glee Club. 315 00:11:13,884 --> 00:11:15,585 We need you. O-O-Okay? 316 00:11:15,653 --> 00:11:18,187 Have you seen those-those purple pianos around school? 317 00:11:18,238 --> 00:11:20,790 We're planning this... this big, you know, recruiting number, 318 00:11:20,857 --> 00:11:23,159 and it's going to be a tribute to the Go-Go's. 319 00:11:23,210 --> 00:11:25,328 I mean, who doesn't love the Go-Go's? 320 00:11:25,379 --> 00:11:26,963 I prefer the Bangles. 321 00:11:27,030 --> 00:11:28,414 Okay. 322 00:11:28,499 --> 00:11:30,199 We need your... 323 00:11:30,250 --> 00:11:33,136 your tremulous alto and your Belinda Carlisle glamour. 324 00:11:33,203 --> 00:11:34,554 I'll give you ten bucks if you let me 325 00:11:34,638 --> 00:11:35,555 beat her up for you, Quinn. 326 00:11:35,623 --> 00:11:37,540 I'm sorry you're so sad, Quinn. 327 00:11:37,591 --> 00:11:39,709 And... maybe you're not going to believe me 328 00:11:39,760 --> 00:11:41,260 because we were never really close, 329 00:11:41,345 --> 00:11:43,563 but I'm sad not seeing you in the choir room. 330 00:11:43,647 --> 00:11:46,516 And we've all been through so much together. 331 00:11:46,567 --> 00:11:49,268 We're a family, and this is our year to get it right. 332 00:11:49,353 --> 00:11:52,322 We would love to have you back in the Glee Club 333 00:11:52,389 --> 00:11:54,324 whenever you're ready. 334 00:11:54,391 --> 00:11:56,225 Okay? 335 00:11:58,278 --> 00:12:00,396 ...making it the zoo's bloodiest weekend 336 00:12:00,447 --> 00:12:02,415 in over six years. 337 00:12:02,499 --> 00:12:05,901 That's what I call "panda-monium." 338 00:12:05,953 --> 00:12:08,204 Now let's hitch a ride over to Sue's Corner 339 00:12:08,255 --> 00:12:10,089 with congressional candidate Sue Sylvester. 340 00:12:10,174 --> 00:12:12,091 Take it away, Sue. 341 00:12:12,176 --> 00:12:13,960 (whistle blows) 342 00:12:14,044 --> 00:12:17,213 Western Ohio, ever since the start of my campaign 343 00:12:17,264 --> 00:12:20,767 to replace Ken "My Heart Stopped Beating and I Died" Weigand, 344 00:12:20,834 --> 00:12:23,085 I've been trying to be positive. 345 00:12:23,137 --> 00:12:25,788 Well, you know what, Fourth Congressional District? 346 00:12:25,856 --> 00:12:28,608 Unless it's a day she's being screened for hepatitis, 347 00:12:28,692 --> 00:12:30,610 this gal's not positive. 348 00:12:30,694 --> 00:12:33,363 And you know what's getting me down, Western Ohio? 349 00:12:33,430 --> 00:12:36,282 The arts in public schools. 350 00:12:36,367 --> 00:12:39,268 Why? Because America is failing. 351 00:12:39,319 --> 00:12:42,438 China is on our ass, people. 352 00:12:42,489 --> 00:12:45,941 This isn't the 1960s anymore, when jobs were plentiful. 353 00:12:45,993 --> 00:12:48,277 And it's not personal, Will Schuester. 354 00:12:48,328 --> 00:12:52,165 The arts are expensive, and we can't afford it anymore. 355 00:12:52,249 --> 00:12:53,716 That's why, tonight, 356 00:12:53,784 --> 00:12:56,085 I'm making a pledge, Fourth Congressional District. 357 00:12:56,153 --> 00:12:59,088 If you honor me by electing me your representative, 358 00:12:59,139 --> 00:13:02,291 I will suspend all public school arts programs, 359 00:13:02,342 --> 00:13:03,459 and reject all You've got to be kidding me. 360 00:13:03,510 --> 00:13:05,511 federal and state funding for the arts 361 00:13:05,596 --> 00:13:09,965 until every single student reads at or above grade level. 362 00:13:10,017 --> 00:13:11,067 Until then, parents, 363 00:13:11,134 --> 00:13:12,802 if you'd like your teenager 364 00:13:12,853 --> 00:13:15,137 to join the Glee Club or play a doorman 365 00:13:15,189 --> 00:13:17,473 in a boring four-hour play about what it's like 366 00:13:17,524 --> 00:13:19,642 to be a middle-aged gay New Yorker, 367 00:13:19,693 --> 00:13:22,144 feel free to pay for it yourself. 368 00:13:22,196 --> 00:13:23,979 But until Ohio's kids 369 00:13:24,031 --> 00:13:27,250 can compete again, it won't be on the taxpayer dime. 370 00:13:28,031 --> 00:13:31,191 And that's how Sue... sees it. 371 00:13:34,095 --> 00:13:34,105 + 372 00:13:35,407 --> 00:13:37,024 She can't do this! 373 00:13:37,075 --> 00:13:40,077 William, it's important you don't take this so personally. 374 00:13:40,162 --> 00:13:42,280 First of all, Sue, you ruined a piece 375 00:13:42,364 --> 00:13:43,981 of private property. Allegedly. 376 00:13:44,049 --> 00:13:46,200 Also, you got your facts all wrong. 377 00:13:46,251 --> 00:13:48,068 The arts help kids do better in school. 378 00:13:48,120 --> 00:13:50,288 Kids in the arts record the lowest instance 379 00:13:50,372 --> 00:13:51,572 of substance abuse. 380 00:13:51,623 --> 00:13:53,257 Tell that to Janis Joplin. 381 00:13:53,342 --> 00:13:55,376 So you see, Sue, I do take this personally. 382 00:13:55,427 --> 00:13:56,911 You're not just threatening an arts program. 383 00:13:56,962 --> 00:13:58,346 You're threatening my livelihood. 384 00:13:58,413 --> 00:13:59,914 I need job security. 385 00:13:59,965 --> 00:14:01,265 I'm in a relationship now. 386 00:14:01,350 --> 00:14:02,967 I-I'm... I'm thinking about starting a family. 387 00:14:03,051 --> 00:14:04,519 Oh, how is it going with Emma? 388 00:14:04,586 --> 00:14:05,520 I'm sure everything in the bedroom 389 00:14:05,587 --> 00:14:06,921 is just completely normal. 390 00:14:06,972 --> 00:14:08,356 Yes! 391 00:14:08,423 --> 00:14:10,107 No. It's so frustrating. 392 00:14:10,192 --> 00:14:12,310 I get the green light, and then the... 393 00:14:12,394 --> 00:14:14,478 the red light comes just as quickly. William... 394 00:14:14,563 --> 00:14:16,430 allow me to ladle you 395 00:14:16,481 --> 00:14:19,817 a piping hot bowl of "this is how it is." 396 00:14:19,902 --> 00:14:21,869 I'm done squabbling with you, okay? 397 00:14:21,937 --> 00:14:23,437 I'm on the national stage 398 00:14:23,488 --> 00:14:25,940 in the white-hot stare of the public eye. 399 00:14:25,991 --> 00:14:27,792 You know, ever since my "Sue's Corner" last night, 400 00:14:27,876 --> 00:14:29,460 I've made tremendous gains in the polls, 401 00:14:29,545 --> 00:14:30,828 and I'm neck and neck 402 00:14:30,913 --> 00:14:32,496 with that rapist running from prison. 403 00:14:32,581 --> 00:14:34,615 So I got bigger fish to fry 404 00:14:34,666 --> 00:14:36,450 than you and your little Glee Club. 405 00:14:36,501 --> 00:14:38,319 So truce for now, macaroni hair. 406 00:14:38,387 --> 00:14:40,137 Oh, and William, 407 00:14:40,222 --> 00:14:43,341 just know, if you do anything to derail 408 00:14:43,425 --> 00:14:46,510 my bullet train to power, I'll destroy you. 409 00:14:46,595 --> 00:14:48,479 (bell ringing) 410 00:14:48,564 --> 00:14:51,349 Ladies, I put plastic on your chairs 411 00:14:51,433 --> 00:14:53,568 in anticipation of this announcement, 412 00:14:53,635 --> 00:14:56,854 so feel free to wet yourselves with excitement. 413 00:14:56,939 --> 00:14:59,407 You are my Cheerio co-captains. 414 00:14:59,474 --> 00:15:01,025 What?! Wait. Co-captains? 415 00:15:01,109 --> 00:15:02,827 With... No. No way. Uh-uh. 416 00:15:02,911 --> 00:15:04,245 I can't work with her! 417 00:15:04,312 --> 00:15:05,830 Nah, nah, nah, see, let me tell you how this 418 00:15:05,914 --> 00:15:06,981 gon' be, if I may. 419 00:15:07,032 --> 00:15:08,165 When I look at a person, 420 00:15:08,250 --> 00:15:09,600 I don't see someone who looks a certain way 421 00:15:09,668 --> 00:15:11,535 or has this or that amount of chromosomes. 422 00:15:11,620 --> 00:15:12,954 I just see someone 423 00:15:13,005 --> 00:15:14,488 who I may or may not have to destroy. 424 00:15:14,539 --> 00:15:15,940 So if you ever tell me 425 00:15:16,008 --> 00:15:18,125 what to do, I will end you. 426 00:15:18,176 --> 00:15:19,794 Bring it, sandbags! 427 00:15:19,845 --> 00:15:22,346 Ladies, I am aroused. 428 00:15:22,431 --> 00:15:25,349 However, we have a more pressing issue at hand. 429 00:15:25,434 --> 00:15:29,804 There are purple pianos polluting this school, 430 00:15:29,855 --> 00:15:32,189 and I will seem weak 431 00:15:32,274 --> 00:15:34,976 if it appears I cannot control my own workspace. 432 00:15:35,027 --> 00:15:38,312 I want you to track down those pianos, take care of them. 433 00:15:38,363 --> 00:15:41,232 (snaps fingers) Make it look like an accident. 434 00:15:41,316 --> 00:15:44,819 Santana, you like playing both sides. 435 00:15:44,870 --> 00:15:46,570 Isn't that right? 436 00:15:46,638 --> 00:15:49,323 What team you playing for this year? 437 00:15:49,374 --> 00:15:51,309 Losers or the winners? 438 00:15:53,912 --> 00:15:55,296 Team Sue. 439 00:15:55,363 --> 00:15:57,415 Glad to hear it. 440 00:16:02,137 --> 00:16:04,221 Why are you guys ignoring Mr. Schuester's assignment? 441 00:16:04,306 --> 00:16:05,389 Wait, is there 442 00:16:05,474 --> 00:16:06,540 a purple piano in here? 443 00:16:06,591 --> 00:16:07,675 Wow. How did any of us miss that? 444 00:16:07,726 --> 00:16:09,260 Okay. We have to do the number. 445 00:16:09,344 --> 00:16:10,261 Okay? 446 00:16:10,345 --> 00:16:11,712 We have to survive lunch. 447 00:16:11,763 --> 00:16:13,347 It's not fair that Mr. Shue put the piano in here. 448 00:16:13,398 --> 00:16:14,882 It's too much pressure. 449 00:16:14,933 --> 00:16:17,234 I agree. That is like wearing a red dress to a bullfight. 450 00:16:17,319 --> 00:16:18,886 The point of the assignment was to find people 451 00:16:18,937 --> 00:16:20,104 who couldn't help but join, okay? 452 00:16:20,188 --> 00:16:21,605 The more people that we sing in front of, 453 00:16:21,690 --> 00:16:23,074 the more chances we have of getting one. 454 00:16:23,158 --> 00:16:24,909 Okay? It's simple mathematics. 455 00:16:24,993 --> 00:16:26,077 Which I stopped attending years ago. 456 00:16:26,161 --> 00:16:28,195 No, no, hold on. Rachel's right. 457 00:16:28,246 --> 00:16:29,280 How's anyone supposed to believe 458 00:16:29,364 --> 00:16:30,665 we can go to Nationals if we 459 00:16:30,732 --> 00:16:31,749 don't even believe in ourselves? 460 00:16:31,833 --> 00:16:33,400 Thank you. 461 00:16:35,403 --> 00:16:37,838 (The Go-Go's' "We Got the Beat" begins) 462 00:16:44,346 --> 00:16:47,548 ♪ See the people walking down the street ♪ 463 00:16:47,599 --> 00:16:51,352 ♪ Fall in line just watching all their feet ♪ 464 00:16:51,419 --> 00:16:53,888 ♪ They don't know where they wanna go ♪ 465 00:16:53,939 --> 00:16:55,639 ♪ They're walking in time ♪ 466 00:16:55,724 --> 00:16:59,393 ♪ And they got the beat, they got the beat ♪ 467 00:16:59,444 --> 00:17:01,612 ♪ They got the beat ♪ 468 00:17:01,697 --> 00:17:04,031 ♪ Yeah, they got the beat ♪ 469 00:17:06,935 --> 00:17:09,653 ♪ All the kids just getting out of school ♪ 470 00:17:09,738 --> 00:17:13,624 ♪ They can't wait to hang out and be cool ♪ 471 00:17:13,709 --> 00:17:15,826 ♪ Hang around till quarter after 12:00 ♪ 472 00:17:15,911 --> 00:17:18,212 ♪ That's when we fall in line ♪ 473 00:17:18,279 --> 00:17:21,465 ♪ They got the beat, they got the beat ♪ 474 00:17:21,550 --> 00:17:23,417 ♪ Kids got the beat ♪ 475 00:17:23,468 --> 00:17:26,954 ♪ Yeah, kids got the beat ♪ 476 00:17:44,856 --> 00:17:47,742 ♪ Go-go music really makes us dance ♪ 477 00:17:47,809 --> 00:17:51,328 ♪ Do the pony, puts us in a trance ♪ 478 00:17:51,413 --> 00:17:53,748 ♪ Do Watusi, just give us a chance ♪ 479 00:17:53,815 --> 00:17:56,367 ♪ That's when we fall in line ♪ 480 00:17:56,451 --> 00:17:59,453 ♪ 'Cause we got the beat, we got the beat ♪ 481 00:17:59,504 --> 00:18:01,789 ♪ We got the beat ♪ 482 00:18:01,840 --> 00:18:03,257 ♪ Yeah, we got it ♪ 483 00:18:04,826 --> 00:18:06,377 ♪ We got the beat ♪ 484 00:18:08,547 --> 00:18:10,330 ♪ We got the beat ♪ 485 00:18:12,217 --> 00:18:13,167 ♪ We got the beat ♪ 486 00:18:13,218 --> 00:18:15,219 ♪ Everybody, get on your feet ♪ 487 00:18:15,303 --> 00:18:16,470 ♪ We got the beat ♪ 488 00:18:16,521 --> 00:18:19,056 ♪ We know you can dance to the beat ♪ 489 00:18:19,141 --> 00:18:21,275 ♪ We got the beat ♪ ♪ Jump and ♪ 490 00:18:21,342 --> 00:18:23,360 ♪ Get down ♪ ♪ We got the beat ♪ 491 00:18:23,445 --> 00:18:25,446 ♪ Round and round and round ♪ ♪ Whoo! ♪ 492 00:18:27,949 --> 00:18:29,867 ♪ We got the beat ♪ ♪ We got the beat ♪ 493 00:18:29,951 --> 00:18:33,454 ♪ We got the beat ♪ ♪ We got the beat ♪ 494 00:18:33,521 --> 00:18:36,040 ♪ We got the beat ♪ ♪ We got the beat ♪ 495 00:18:36,124 --> 00:18:37,958 ♪ Whoo! ♪ ♪ We got the beat ♪ 496 00:18:38,026 --> 00:18:39,359 ♪ We got the beat ♪ ♪ We got the beat ♪ 497 00:18:39,411 --> 00:18:40,694 ♪ We got the beat ♪ 498 00:18:40,745 --> 00:18:41,745 ♪ We got the beat. ♪ 499 00:18:45,634 --> 00:18:47,301 (chuckling) 500 00:18:49,721 --> 00:18:51,806 God, no. 501 00:18:51,873 --> 00:18:53,974 Food fight! 502 00:18:54,042 --> 00:18:55,810 (students yelling) 503 00:19:12,066 --> 00:19:12,076 + 504 00:19:13,874 --> 00:19:15,041 Ugh. 505 00:19:15,092 --> 00:19:16,425 ARTIE: I thought slushies were bad, 506 00:19:16,510 --> 00:19:18,794 but spaghetti sauce in the eye is so much worse. 507 00:19:18,862 --> 00:19:19,962 I have pepperoni in my bra. 508 00:19:20,047 --> 00:19:21,714 Those are your nipples. 509 00:19:21,765 --> 00:19:23,766 Mr. Shue, if you are trying to break us down 510 00:19:23,851 --> 00:19:25,268 to rebuild us, it's working. 511 00:19:25,352 --> 00:19:26,919 Not one single person was inspired 512 00:19:26,970 --> 00:19:29,388 by our hot lunch jam to try out, Mr. Shue. 513 00:19:29,439 --> 00:19:30,589 GIRL: It's true. 514 00:19:30,641 --> 00:19:32,058 You guys sucked ass. 515 00:19:33,610 --> 00:19:34,961 I'm sorry. And you are? 516 00:19:35,028 --> 00:19:36,229 I'm Sugar Motta. 517 00:19:36,280 --> 00:19:38,147 And I have self-diagnosed Asperger's, 518 00:19:38,232 --> 00:19:40,483 so I can pretty much say whatever I want. 519 00:19:40,567 --> 00:19:42,118 I'm like a diplomat's daughter. 520 00:19:42,202 --> 00:19:43,236 How can we help you, Sugar? 521 00:19:43,287 --> 00:19:44,654 Here's the deal. 522 00:19:44,738 --> 00:19:46,989 I'm awesome, and I want to be a big, big star. 523 00:19:47,074 --> 00:19:49,242 And when I saw you guys singing and dancing 524 00:19:49,309 --> 00:19:50,743 in the cafeteria, I thought, 525 00:19:50,794 --> 00:19:52,745 "I am so much better than you." 526 00:19:52,796 --> 00:19:54,380 Sorry. Asperger's. 527 00:19:54,447 --> 00:19:55,798 Well, great. 528 00:19:55,883 --> 00:19:57,583 You see, guys? 529 00:19:57,634 --> 00:19:58,951 You have inspired an audition. 530 00:19:59,002 --> 00:20:00,419 Good job. (gloved applause) 531 00:20:00,470 --> 00:20:02,305 WILL: Sugar, why don't you show us what you can do? 532 00:20:02,389 --> 00:20:05,057 You know, take your time. Whenever you're ready. 533 00:20:05,125 --> 00:20:06,676 Sugar Motta. 534 00:20:06,760 --> 00:20:08,127 Why does that name sound familiar? 535 00:20:08,178 --> 00:20:09,795 Oh, her daddy's the rich dude 536 00:20:09,846 --> 00:20:11,480 that donated the purple pianos. 537 00:20:11,565 --> 00:20:13,632 Get ready to taste some sweet ear candy. 538 00:20:15,652 --> 00:20:16,986 Hit it, hottie. 539 00:20:17,070 --> 00:20:18,905 ("Big Spender" begins) 540 00:20:26,813 --> 00:20:30,750 (outrageously off-key): ♪ The minute you walked in the joint ♪ 541 00:20:30,817 --> 00:20:34,387 ♪ I could see you were a man of distinction ♪ 542 00:20:34,454 --> 00:20:37,206 ♪ A real big spender ♪ 543 00:20:37,291 --> 00:20:41,844 ♪ Good-looking, so refined ♪ 544 00:20:41,929 --> 00:20:45,548 ♪ Wouldn't you like to know what's going on in my mind? ♪ 545 00:20:45,632 --> 00:20:48,050 Her ears should get to park in my handicapped spot. 546 00:20:48,135 --> 00:20:50,002 ♪ Hey, big spender ♪ 547 00:20:50,070 --> 00:20:53,973 ♪ Spend... oh ♪ 548 00:20:54,024 --> 00:20:56,859 ♪ A little time ♪ 549 00:20:56,944 --> 00:21:01,063 ♪ With me ♪ 550 00:21:01,148 --> 00:21:03,482 ♪ Yeah. ♪ 551 00:21:03,533 --> 00:21:05,901 Holy sh... Sugar. 552 00:21:05,986 --> 00:21:07,653 Text me re: our rehearsal "skedge." 553 00:21:07,704 --> 00:21:08,687 Of course. 554 00:21:08,789 --> 00:21:09,855 Mr. Shue, stop speaking. 555 00:21:09,906 --> 00:21:10,873 Okay. 556 00:21:10,958 --> 00:21:12,792 Uh, Sugar... 557 00:21:12,859 --> 00:21:14,043 we'll be in touch. 558 00:21:14,127 --> 00:21:15,328 Thank you. Bye. 559 00:21:16,880 --> 00:21:19,799 Okay, I think I speak for everyone when I say-- 560 00:21:19,883 --> 00:21:21,667 never gonna happen. 561 00:21:21,718 --> 00:21:24,036 Guys, I know she was a little rough, 562 00:21:24,087 --> 00:21:25,704 but we have always had the policy 563 00:21:25,756 --> 00:21:27,223 that anyone who tries out gets in. 564 00:21:27,307 --> 00:21:28,557 You're not doing her any good 565 00:21:28,642 --> 00:21:29,976 sheltering Sugar from the truth, okay? 566 00:21:30,043 --> 00:21:32,345 High school is where you learn survival of the fittest. 567 00:21:32,429 --> 00:21:34,213 She's going to drag the New Directions! down, 568 00:21:34,264 --> 00:21:35,547 and that's not fair for those of us 569 00:21:35,599 --> 00:21:36,732 who don't want to spend our lives 570 00:21:36,817 --> 00:21:38,217 rotting in this insignificant town. 571 00:21:38,268 --> 00:21:39,735 You said the other day 572 00:21:39,820 --> 00:21:41,570 that you would do anything to get us to Nationals. 573 00:21:41,655 --> 00:21:42,989 Okay, and she is going to keep us 574 00:21:43,056 --> 00:21:44,440 from winning that elusive crown. 575 00:21:44,524 --> 00:21:46,075 If anything, she's going to kill all of our chances. 576 00:21:46,159 --> 00:21:47,943 (bell ringing) 577 00:21:48,028 --> 00:21:49,996 WILL: I just can't look a kid in the eye and say, 578 00:21:50,063 --> 00:21:51,864 "You're not good enough to be in Glee Club." 579 00:21:51,915 --> 00:21:53,949 Was she that bad? 580 00:21:54,034 --> 00:21:57,586 Sugar Motta was just... awful. 581 00:21:57,671 --> 00:21:59,338 I mean, I have never seen someone 582 00:21:59,406 --> 00:22:00,956 with so little musical talent. 583 00:22:01,041 --> 00:22:03,175 But that shouldn't have anything to do with being 584 00:22:03,243 --> 00:22:04,743 a part of a club. 585 00:22:04,795 --> 00:22:06,962 So make her water boy or mascot or something. 586 00:22:07,047 --> 00:22:08,764 That's what I do with my hardest luck cases. 587 00:22:08,849 --> 00:22:11,000 You know how many guys I cut last week? 60. 588 00:22:11,068 --> 00:22:12,501 And all of them with big dreams. 589 00:22:12,569 --> 00:22:13,636 And I crushed 'em 590 00:22:13,720 --> 00:22:16,272 like pigs in a blanket. (squealing) 591 00:22:16,356 --> 00:22:19,859 How? I mean, doesn't that just eat you up? 592 00:22:19,926 --> 00:22:21,143 Of course. 593 00:22:21,228 --> 00:22:23,312 But it's my job to put the guys I take 594 00:22:23,397 --> 00:22:24,947 in the best position to win. 595 00:22:25,032 --> 00:22:26,148 It's the same as you. 596 00:22:26,233 --> 00:22:28,267 The arts are different than football. 597 00:22:28,318 --> 00:22:30,236 You win Nationals this year, 598 00:22:30,287 --> 00:22:33,572 you're buying that Glee Club ten more years. 599 00:22:33,623 --> 00:22:35,157 EMMA: Curve ball-- 600 00:22:35,242 --> 00:22:37,076 so you just passed "undecided" 601 00:22:37,127 --> 00:22:38,961 and "anyone white" in the polls. 602 00:22:39,046 --> 00:22:41,580 It looks like our anti-arts platform is actually working. 603 00:22:41,631 --> 00:22:42,998 Maybe I should rough her up a little bit. 604 00:22:43,083 --> 00:22:44,950 Go all Deliverance on her or something, huh? 605 00:22:45,052 --> 00:22:46,452 WILL: No. 606 00:22:46,503 --> 00:22:48,454 This is my fight. 607 00:22:48,505 --> 00:22:50,589 It's my program she wants to cut, 608 00:22:50,674 --> 00:22:52,058 and my kids. 609 00:22:52,125 --> 00:22:54,176 What are you going to do? 610 00:22:54,261 --> 00:22:56,829 Something I should have done a long time ago. 611 00:22:58,298 --> 00:23:00,099 Sue wants to declare war on the arts? 612 00:23:00,150 --> 00:23:04,070 Well, General Schuester is about to launch a counteroffensive. 613 00:23:06,473 --> 00:23:09,575 So this is what being turned on feels like. 614 00:23:09,642 --> 00:23:11,360 (bell rings) 615 00:23:11,445 --> 00:23:14,330 It all seems so hopelessly provincial now. 616 00:23:14,414 --> 00:23:16,165 I mean, once you've performed on the stage 617 00:23:16,249 --> 00:23:18,650 of the Gershwin Theatre and felt the lights of Broadway 618 00:23:18,702 --> 00:23:21,253 on your face for the first time... 619 00:23:21,321 --> 00:23:22,821 Nothing else compares. 620 00:23:22,873 --> 00:23:25,624 What's the purple piano doing here? 621 00:23:25,675 --> 00:23:28,043 Well, I commandeered it 622 00:23:28,128 --> 00:23:30,662 to help us get ready for our NYADA mixer. 623 00:23:30,714 --> 00:23:32,431 Whatever rejects show up at that place, 624 00:23:32,499 --> 00:23:34,383 are gonna be expecting 625 00:23:34,468 --> 00:23:35,551 Pepperidge Farm cookies and punch, 626 00:23:35,635 --> 00:23:37,853 not Velma and Roxie. 627 00:23:37,938 --> 00:23:39,438 We need to intimidate those wannabes 628 00:23:39,506 --> 00:23:41,307 into never wanting to audition against us. Genius! 629 00:23:42,692 --> 00:23:44,676 Wicked again? No. 630 00:23:44,728 --> 00:23:46,862 Before there was Wicked, there was... 631 00:23:46,947 --> 00:23:48,013 (gasps) Don't even finish that sentence. 632 00:23:48,115 --> 00:23:49,615 Hit it! 633 00:23:49,682 --> 00:23:54,620 (jazz version of "Ding Dong! the Witch is Dead" begins) 634 00:23:54,687 --> 00:23:59,291 ♪ Once there was a wicked witch in the lovely land of Oz ♪ 635 00:23:59,359 --> 00:24:01,860 ♪ And a wickeder, wickeder, wickeder witch ♪ 636 00:24:01,912 --> 00:24:04,363 ♪ There never, ever was ♪ 637 00:24:04,414 --> 00:24:06,865 ♪ She filled the folks in Munchkinland ♪ 638 00:24:06,917 --> 00:24:09,701 ♪ With terror and with dread ♪ 639 00:24:09,753 --> 00:24:11,554 ♪ Till one fine day from Kansas ♪ 640 00:24:11,638 --> 00:24:14,706 ♪ A house fell on her head ♪ 641 00:24:14,758 --> 00:24:18,227 ♪ And the coroner pronounced her... ♪ 642 00:24:21,064 --> 00:24:22,064 ♪ Dead ♪ 643 00:24:22,149 --> 00:24:23,432 ♪ And through the town ♪ 644 00:24:23,517 --> 00:24:26,936 ♪ The joyous news went runnin' ♪ 645 00:24:27,020 --> 00:24:28,554 ♪ The joyous news ♪ 646 00:24:28,605 --> 00:24:31,607 ♪ That the wicked old witch was finally done in ♪ 647 00:24:37,564 --> 00:24:39,915 ♪ Ding-dong, the Witch is dead ♪ 648 00:24:40,000 --> 00:24:41,116 ♪ Which old Witch? ♪ 649 00:24:41,201 --> 00:24:42,084 ♪ Well, uh, the Wicked Witch! ♪ 650 00:24:42,169 --> 00:24:43,452 ♪ Oh ♪ 651 00:24:43,537 --> 00:24:45,421 ♪ Ding-dong, the Wicked Witch is dead ♪ 652 00:24:45,505 --> 00:24:47,540 ♪ Oh, yeah, happy day ♪ 653 00:24:47,591 --> 00:24:49,575 ♪ Wake up, you sleepy head ♪ 654 00:24:49,626 --> 00:24:51,243 ♪ Rub your eyes ♪ 655 00:24:51,294 --> 00:24:52,678 ♪ And get out of that bed ♪ 656 00:24:52,745 --> 00:24:57,383 ♪ Wake up, the Wicked Witch is dead ♪ 657 00:24:57,434 --> 00:25:00,302 ♪ She's gone where the goblins go ♪ 658 00:25:00,387 --> 00:25:02,721 ♪ Below, below, below ♪ 659 00:25:02,772 --> 00:25:06,525 ♪ Yo-ho, let's open up and sing ♪ 660 00:25:06,593 --> 00:25:07,776 ♪ And ring those bells out ♪ 661 00:25:07,861 --> 00:25:10,729 ♪ Sing the news out ♪ 662 00:25:10,780 --> 00:25:11,814 (Rachel laughs) 663 00:25:11,898 --> 00:25:14,033 ♪ Ding-dong, the merry-oh ♪ 664 00:25:14,100 --> 00:25:16,452 ♪ Sing it high, sing it low ♪ 665 00:25:16,536 --> 00:25:21,624 ♪ Let them know the Wicked ol' Witch is dead! ♪ 666 00:25:21,708 --> 00:25:23,792 ♪ Why, everyone's glad she took such a crownin' ♪ 667 00:25:23,877 --> 00:25:27,296 ♪ Gettin' hit by a house is even worse than drownin' ♪ 668 00:25:27,380 --> 00:25:33,402 ♪ Let 'em know the wicked ol' Witch is dead! ♪ 669 00:25:35,305 --> 00:25:36,722 (song ends) 670 00:25:36,789 --> 00:25:38,624 Those kids are never even gonna know what hit them. 671 00:25:40,107 --> 00:25:40,117 + 672 00:25:41,244 --> 00:25:42,745 Ladies, the key to successful 673 00:25:42,829 --> 00:25:45,631 Cheerios! tryouts is in brutal honesty. 674 00:25:45,698 --> 00:25:47,499 Actually, maybe just brutality, 675 00:25:47,567 --> 00:25:50,953 as I have no intention of bringing anyone new in. 676 00:25:51,020 --> 00:25:53,122 I just basically want to see people cry. 677 00:25:53,206 --> 00:25:53,905 Hit it! 678 00:25:54,958 --> 00:25:55,541 Terrible! 679 00:25:57,393 --> 00:25:58,761 What is wrong with you? 680 00:26:01,247 --> 00:26:02,514 Next. 681 00:26:02,582 --> 00:26:06,151 Well, well, well, Wavy Gravy, Dr. Zaius. 682 00:26:06,219 --> 00:26:08,086 To what do I owe this pleasure? 683 00:26:08,138 --> 00:26:10,005 Candidate Sylvester, 684 00:26:10,073 --> 00:26:13,942 To what do I owe this pleasure? 685 00:26:14,027 --> 00:26:16,895 Every tiny grain of this glitter represents a kid 686 00:26:16,963 --> 00:26:18,981 whose dream won't come true if you get elected 687 00:26:19,065 --> 00:26:20,315 and end school arts programs. 688 00:26:20,400 --> 00:26:21,617 John F. Kennedy once said, 689 00:26:21,701 --> 00:26:24,269 "The arts are the roots of our culture." 690 00:26:24,320 --> 00:26:27,072 The arts enrich our lives and help kids achieve 691 00:26:27,123 --> 00:26:28,773 in all walks of life. 692 00:26:28,825 --> 00:26:29,875 Sue Sylvester... 693 00:26:32,462 --> 00:26:34,246 ...you just got glitter-bombed. 694 00:26:34,297 --> 00:26:35,164 You get that? Mm-hmm. 695 00:26:35,248 --> 00:26:36,148 Okay, come on. Come on. 696 00:26:37,834 --> 00:26:40,552 Becky, I need the two of you to escort me 697 00:26:40,620 --> 00:26:44,122 to my hyperbaric chamber, as I have glitter in my eyes. 698 00:26:46,176 --> 00:26:48,227 (bell rings) 699 00:26:51,264 --> 00:26:52,931 Hey, you. 700 00:26:52,982 --> 00:26:56,268 Well, aren't you a sight for these sore eyes. 701 00:26:56,319 --> 00:26:58,103 Bad day? 702 00:26:58,154 --> 00:26:59,804 (sighing): Bad week, more like it. 703 00:26:59,856 --> 00:27:01,473 Hey, what are you doing here? 704 00:27:01,524 --> 00:27:03,192 Shouldn't you be at Warbler practice? 705 00:27:03,276 --> 00:27:05,244 You know, putting fine tuning touches 706 00:27:05,311 --> 00:27:06,945 on our new Katy Perry showstopper? 707 00:27:06,996 --> 00:27:08,813 Okay, for someone who loves clothes so much, 708 00:27:08,865 --> 00:27:10,365 I can't believe you haven't noticed that 709 00:27:10,450 --> 00:27:11,783 I'm not in my Warbler outfit. 710 00:27:11,835 --> 00:27:14,253 Wait, wait... 711 00:27:16,122 --> 00:27:18,323 (Kurt gasps, Blaine laughs) 712 00:27:18,374 --> 00:27:20,459 Wait-wait-- you didn't do this for me, did you? 713 00:27:20,510 --> 00:27:22,010 Because if you did this for me, 714 00:27:22,095 --> 00:27:23,462 I mean, it would be very romantic for one, 715 00:27:23,513 --> 00:27:25,297 but it could lead to resentment, which could lead to anger, 716 00:27:25,348 --> 00:27:26,849 which could lead to a horrible, horrible, nasty breakup 717 00:27:26,933 --> 00:27:27,883 like, you know, on The Bachelorette, 718 00:27:27,967 --> 00:27:29,101 when we watched that... 719 00:27:29,168 --> 00:27:30,669 Hey, I came here for me. 720 00:27:30,720 --> 00:27:34,273 Because I can't stand to be apart from the person I love. 721 00:27:35,859 --> 00:27:38,143 Well, I guess we'll just have to find a way 722 00:27:38,194 --> 00:27:40,028 to ease you into the New Directions! now, huh? 723 00:27:40,113 --> 00:27:41,947 I've already have that figured out. 724 00:27:42,014 --> 00:27:44,867 (Tom Jones' "It's Not Unusual" begins) 725 00:27:53,359 --> 00:27:58,630 ♪ It's not unusual to be loved by anyone ♪ 726 00:27:58,698 --> 00:28:03,368 ♪ It's not unusual to have fun with anyone ♪ 727 00:28:03,419 --> 00:28:08,223 ♪ But when I see you hanging about with anyone ♪ 728 00:28:08,308 --> 00:28:13,178 ♪ It's not unusual to see me cry ♪ 729 00:28:13,229 --> 00:28:15,547 ♪ I wanna die ♪ 730 00:28:17,100 --> 00:28:21,886 ♪ It's not unusual to go out at any time ♪ 731 00:28:21,938 --> 00:28:27,292 ♪ But when I see you out and about it's such a crime ♪ 732 00:28:27,360 --> 00:28:32,197 ♪ If you should ever want to be loved by anyone ♪ 733 00:28:32,248 --> 00:28:34,533 ♪ It's not unusual ♪ 734 00:28:34,584 --> 00:28:36,785 ♪ It happens every day ♪ 735 00:28:36,869 --> 00:28:40,088 ♪ No matter what you say ♪ 736 00:28:40,173 --> 00:28:44,909 ♪ You find it happens all the time ♪ 737 00:28:44,961 --> 00:28:47,346 ♪ Love will never do ♪ 738 00:28:47,413 --> 00:28:50,215 ♪ What you want it to ♪ 739 00:28:50,266 --> 00:28:57,806 ♪ Why can't this crazy love be mine? ♪ 740 00:29:08,201 --> 00:29:12,321 ♪ It's not unusual to be mad with anyone ♪ 741 00:29:13,906 --> 00:29:19,578 ♪ It's not unusual to be sad with anyone ♪ 742 00:29:19,629 --> 00:29:24,049 ♪ But if I ever find that you've changed at any time ♪ 743 00:29:24,116 --> 00:29:29,120 ♪ It's not unusual to find out I'm in love with you ♪ 744 00:29:29,172 --> 00:29:31,556 ♪ Whoa-whoa-whoa, oh-oh-oh ♪ 745 00:29:31,624 --> 00:29:33,558 ♪ Whoa-whoa, whoa-oh ♪ 746 00:29:33,626 --> 00:29:38,063 ♪ Whoa-whoa, oh-oh-oh-oh ♪ 747 00:29:38,130 --> 00:29:39,765 ♪ Whoa-whoa. ♪ 748 00:29:42,101 --> 00:29:43,185 (song ends) 749 00:29:43,269 --> 00:29:44,236 (applause) 750 00:29:52,228 --> 00:29:52,238 + 751 00:29:53,000 --> 00:29:54,667 Okay, so you're gonna set up the props, 752 00:29:54,752 --> 00:29:55,952 I'll plug in the boombox, 753 00:29:56,003 --> 00:29:57,253 and we'll launch immediately into the number. 754 00:29:57,304 --> 00:29:58,555 Our somewhat-talented 755 00:29:58,622 --> 00:30:00,390 but sadly delusional competition will just rip up 756 00:30:00,474 --> 00:30:02,291 their applications in fits of jealous rage. 757 00:30:02,343 --> 00:30:03,676 And then they'll all just melt away 758 00:30:03,761 --> 00:30:05,228 like the Wicked Witch of the West herself! 759 00:30:05,295 --> 00:30:06,513 You know what? 760 00:30:06,597 --> 00:30:10,266 I kinda feel sorry for them. Me, too. 761 00:30:10,317 --> 00:30:11,684 (giggles) 762 00:30:20,811 --> 00:30:22,278 Hi, I'm Harmony. 763 00:30:22,329 --> 00:30:23,113 What's your name, where are you from, 764 00:30:23,164 --> 00:30:24,664 and what are your credits? 765 00:30:24,749 --> 00:30:27,150 Well, I'm, I'm Rachel. I'm Pendelton! I'm Canada! 766 00:30:27,201 --> 00:30:28,501 I'm Gavroche, named after 767 00:30:28,586 --> 00:30:30,820 ze feisty French street urchin from Les Mis! 768 00:30:30,871 --> 00:30:32,922 I know you totally recognize me. 769 00:30:32,990 --> 00:30:34,374 It's 'cause I'm the Gerber baby. 770 00:30:34,458 --> 00:30:36,459 I've been acting since I was a fetus... literally. 771 00:30:36,510 --> 00:30:38,628 An ultrasound of me was featured on Murder She Wrote. 772 00:30:38,679 --> 00:30:40,296 I'm starring as Rizzo in an all-male production 773 00:30:40,381 --> 00:30:42,098 of Grease. Welcome, welcome, welcome! 774 00:30:42,166 --> 00:30:45,301 As my future husband Robert Pattinson always says, 775 00:30:45,352 --> 00:30:47,003 "It's refreshing to get new blood." 776 00:30:47,054 --> 00:30:48,271 Oh! New blood? 777 00:30:48,338 --> 00:30:49,606 We've been meeting here each month 778 00:30:49,673 --> 00:30:51,641 since we were freshmen, literally. 779 00:30:51,692 --> 00:30:55,178 Well, actually Kurt and I just found out about this on Monday. 780 00:30:55,229 --> 00:30:57,013 But speaking of "refreshing," we've put together a number 781 00:30:57,064 --> 00:30:58,064 that we think you guys... Places! 782 00:30:59,700 --> 00:31:00,950 You're just in time to see a little number 783 00:31:01,035 --> 00:31:02,318 we've been futzing around with. 784 00:31:02,369 --> 00:31:04,788 Thank God there was a bar mitzvah here on Saturday. 785 00:31:04,855 --> 00:31:07,073 And I convinced them not to strike the stage. 786 00:31:07,158 --> 00:31:11,795 So sit back, relax, and most importantly, enjoy. 787 00:31:11,862 --> 00:31:12,695 Thank you. 788 00:31:12,746 --> 00:31:13,797 Oh, my God... 789 00:31:13,864 --> 00:31:15,465 Just, just breathe and smile, okay? 790 00:31:15,532 --> 00:31:17,717 Just 'cause they look like us and act like us 791 00:31:17,802 --> 00:31:19,169 doesn't mean they're better than us. 792 00:31:19,220 --> 00:31:20,837 ("Anything Goes" begins) 793 00:31:20,888 --> 00:31:22,972 ♪ Times have changed! ♪ 794 00:31:25,209 --> 00:31:28,144 ♪ And we've often rewound the clock ♪ 795 00:31:28,212 --> 00:31:30,730 ♪ Since the Puritans got a shock ♪ 796 00:31:30,798 --> 00:31:34,484 ♪ When they landed on Plymouth Rock! ♪ 797 00:31:34,551 --> 00:31:38,488 ♪ If today ♪ 798 00:31:38,555 --> 00:31:41,557 ♪ Any shock they should try to stem ♪ 799 00:31:41,609 --> 00:31:44,911 ♪ 'Stead of landing on Plymouth Rock ♪ 800 00:31:44,995 --> 00:31:51,167 ♪ Plymouth Rock would land on them! ♪ 801 00:31:51,235 --> 00:31:53,236 ♪ In olden days ♪ 802 00:31:53,287 --> 00:31:55,872 ♪ A glimpse of stocking ♪ 803 00:31:55,923 --> 00:31:57,841 ♪ Was looked on as something shocking ♪ 804 00:31:57,908 --> 00:32:00,076 ♪ But now God knows ♪ 805 00:32:00,127 --> 00:32:04,430 ♪ Anything goes! ♪ 806 00:32:04,515 --> 00:32:06,582 ♪ Good authors, too, who once knew better words ♪ 807 00:32:06,684 --> 00:32:11,521 ♪ Now only use four-letter words writing prose ♪ 808 00:32:11,588 --> 00:32:13,690 ♪ Anything goes ♪ 809 00:32:15,392 --> 00:32:17,944 ♪ Anything you can be, I can be greater ♪ 810 00:32:18,028 --> 00:32:20,313 ♪ Sooner or later, I'm greater than you ♪ 811 00:32:20,397 --> 00:32:21,731 ♪ No, you're not! ♪ ♪ Yes, I am ♪ 812 00:32:21,782 --> 00:32:23,399 ♪ No, you're not! ♪ ♪ Yes, I am ♪ 813 00:32:23,450 --> 00:32:25,902 ♪ No, you're not! ♪ ♪ Yes, I am, yes, I am! ♪ 814 00:32:25,953 --> 00:32:29,038 (lively orchestral interlude) 815 00:32:29,106 --> 00:32:31,074 (tap shoes clacking) 816 00:32:45,222 --> 00:32:48,174 ♪ The world has gone mad today and good's bad today ♪ 817 00:32:48,259 --> 00:32:50,510 ♪ Black's white today and day's night today ♪ 818 00:32:50,594 --> 00:32:52,729 ♪ When most guys today that women prize today ♪ 819 00:32:52,796 --> 00:32:54,764 ♪ Are just silly gigolos! ♪ 820 00:32:54,815 --> 00:32:57,317 ♪ Any note you can hold, I can hold longer ♪ 821 00:32:57,401 --> 00:32:59,468 ♪ I can hold any note longer than you ♪ 822 00:32:59,520 --> 00:33:01,821 ♪ No, you can't, no, you can't ♪ ♪ Yes, I can, yes, I can ♪ 823 00:33:01,906 --> 00:33:03,523 ♪ No, you can't ♪ ♪ Yes, I can ♪ 824 00:33:03,607 --> 00:33:09,329 ♪ No, you can't, no, no... ♪ ♪ Yes, I... ♪ 825 00:33:09,413 --> 00:33:12,148 ♪ Anything goes ♪ 826 00:33:12,249 --> 00:33:14,617 (continues singing note) 827 00:33:14,668 --> 00:33:17,003 ♪ Yes... I... ♪ ♪ No... you... ♪ 828 00:33:17,087 --> 00:33:19,455 ♪ Can... ♪ ♪ Can't... ♪ 829 00:33:19,506 --> 00:33:21,791 ♪ Anything goes. ♪ 830 00:33:24,445 --> 00:33:29,165 I've never, I've never been so humiliated in my life. 831 00:33:29,216 --> 00:33:30,550 Me, either. 832 00:33:30,634 --> 00:33:32,685 And that's a really high bar. 833 00:33:32,770 --> 00:33:35,939 I mean, they were so... 834 00:33:36,006 --> 00:33:37,557 Fabulous. 835 00:33:37,641 --> 00:33:39,192 (crying softly) 836 00:33:39,276 --> 00:33:41,444 Rachel, we might be hot stuff at McKinley, 837 00:33:41,511 --> 00:33:44,981 but outside those walls, we aren't even stuff. 838 00:33:45,065 --> 00:33:48,034 I mean, we've been deluded and arrogant. 839 00:33:48,118 --> 00:33:49,352 (sobs) 840 00:33:49,403 --> 00:33:52,155 What if we're not good enough to make it? 841 00:33:52,206 --> 00:33:54,023 No. 842 00:33:54,074 --> 00:33:55,742 There's only one thing to do. 843 00:33:55,826 --> 00:33:58,027 (blows nose) We just have to move to another town 844 00:33:58,078 --> 00:33:59,879 and just erase our identities 845 00:33:59,964 --> 00:34:01,547 and just resign to a sad life of community theater. 846 00:34:01,665 --> 00:34:03,132 Don't say that. 847 00:34:03,200 --> 00:34:06,002 Nun-Sense, Love Letters, The Vagina Monologues. 848 00:34:06,053 --> 00:34:07,971 Face it, I mean, this is our future. 849 00:34:08,038 --> 00:34:11,057 Not everyone's dreams come true. 850 00:34:11,141 --> 00:34:12,058 You know what? 851 00:34:12,142 --> 00:34:13,509 (sniffles) 852 00:34:13,560 --> 00:34:15,878 I'm ending this pity party right now. 853 00:34:15,929 --> 00:34:17,430 Okay. 854 00:34:17,514 --> 00:34:19,315 Take a look at yourself. 855 00:34:19,383 --> 00:34:20,600 What do you see? 856 00:34:20,684 --> 00:34:23,069 Come on. 857 00:34:23,153 --> 00:34:25,104 Sad, puffy, red eyes 858 00:34:25,189 --> 00:34:28,024 filled with dashed hopes and dreams. 859 00:34:28,075 --> 00:34:30,243 Rachel Berry. 860 00:34:30,327 --> 00:34:32,028 One of a kind. 861 00:34:32,079 --> 00:34:33,396 (thunder rumbling) There's no one like you. 862 00:34:33,447 --> 00:34:35,114 Well, that's actually kind of funny, 863 00:34:35,199 --> 00:34:36,866 because it seems like there is. 864 00:34:36,917 --> 00:34:39,285 Okay, fine, so you've never been in a high school production. 865 00:34:39,370 --> 00:34:41,621 Or any production, because, you know, Cabaret was canceled 866 00:34:41,705 --> 00:34:43,039 and so was Rocky Horror. 867 00:34:43,123 --> 00:34:44,907 Mm-mm. They had credits, Kurt. 868 00:34:44,958 --> 00:34:46,092 In utero credits. 869 00:34:46,176 --> 00:34:48,961 Okay, so they have more experience. 870 00:34:49,046 --> 00:34:50,746 They have more talent. 871 00:34:50,798 --> 00:34:53,416 But you are fierce, Rachel. 872 00:34:53,467 --> 00:34:57,520 Your ambition does push-ups while you sleep. 873 00:34:57,587 --> 00:34:59,972 Nobody wants it more than you. 874 00:35:00,057 --> 00:35:01,924 Nobody. 875 00:35:04,428 --> 00:35:07,113 And you're not giving up on this. 876 00:35:07,197 --> 00:35:09,482 'Cause I'm not gonna let you. 877 00:35:09,566 --> 00:35:11,367 You are getting into that school. 878 00:35:15,489 --> 00:35:17,106 (sniffles) 879 00:35:17,157 --> 00:35:18,774 You make me want to be your boyfriend. 880 00:35:18,826 --> 00:35:20,793 (chuckles) 881 00:35:20,911 --> 00:35:22,495 You're getting in, too. 882 00:35:22,579 --> 00:35:23,496 I know it. 883 00:35:23,580 --> 00:35:26,782 I doubt it. 884 00:35:26,834 --> 00:35:29,335 I'm woefully thin on extracurriculars. 885 00:35:29,420 --> 00:35:31,304 It's not too late. 886 00:35:31,388 --> 00:35:33,556 I mean, you could, you know, still sign up for some clubs. 887 00:35:33,623 --> 00:35:36,426 There's the student council. 888 00:35:36,477 --> 00:35:39,345 I'm not the only fierce one. 889 00:35:39,430 --> 00:35:41,981 (sniffles) 890 00:35:42,066 --> 00:35:44,484 Swear it. 891 00:35:44,568 --> 00:35:45,685 We're gonna do this. 892 00:35:57,831 --> 00:35:58,998 (both laugh) 893 00:35:59,083 --> 00:36:02,085 (sniffles, sighs) 894 00:36:02,152 --> 00:36:03,986 You realize we just did the gay high-five. 895 00:36:04,037 --> 00:36:04,837 (laughs): Yeah, we did. 896 00:36:06,009 --> 00:36:06,019 + 897 00:36:06,705 --> 00:36:08,072 (alarm beeping) 898 00:36:11,493 --> 00:36:14,728 Rise and shine, sleepyhead. 899 00:36:14,780 --> 00:36:16,163 Come on. 900 00:36:19,668 --> 00:36:21,368 I don't want to go to school today. 901 00:36:21,420 --> 00:36:23,003 I know. 902 00:36:23,071 --> 00:36:26,073 It's the right thing to do for the club, the greater good. 903 00:36:26,124 --> 00:36:28,075 I just can't kill a kid's dream. 904 00:36:28,126 --> 00:36:29,927 I can't do it. 905 00:36:30,011 --> 00:36:32,963 Will, you glitter-bombed Sue. 906 00:36:33,048 --> 00:36:36,851 This week, you stopped being a man of words, 907 00:36:36,918 --> 00:36:39,136 and you became a man of action. 908 00:36:39,221 --> 00:36:42,089 And it was super-hot. 909 00:36:46,862 --> 00:36:48,112 (bell ringing) 910 00:36:48,196 --> 00:36:49,613 Obviously your ears are busted because 911 00:36:49,698 --> 00:36:51,031 I worked that song like a hooker pole. 912 00:36:51,099 --> 00:36:52,266 It's no biggie. 913 00:36:52,317 --> 00:36:53,534 I'll come in and I'll do it again. 914 00:36:53,601 --> 00:36:56,403 Sugar, I'm sorry... you can't sing. 915 00:36:56,455 --> 00:36:57,955 The answer is no. 916 00:36:58,039 --> 00:36:59,290 But I love your enthusiasm, 917 00:36:59,374 --> 00:37:01,826 and I'd be so happy to work with you so that... 918 00:37:01,910 --> 00:37:03,544 You know what? Who cares what you think? 919 00:37:03,611 --> 00:37:05,663 Hmm? Nobody. 920 00:37:05,747 --> 00:37:07,281 You're a washed-up Broadway wannabe 921 00:37:07,332 --> 00:37:08,782 who's stuck in Lima 922 00:37:08,834 --> 00:37:10,751 and has led the Glee Club to how many National wins? 923 00:37:10,802 --> 00:37:12,520 Oh, I'm sorry, zero. 924 00:37:12,587 --> 00:37:15,422 Not Asperger's! 925 00:37:15,474 --> 00:37:18,642 SUE: Nicely played, William. 926 00:37:18,727 --> 00:37:19,844 (chuckles) 927 00:37:19,928 --> 00:37:22,229 You know, I have to say, I'm really enjoying 928 00:37:22,297 --> 00:37:24,932 this new stink of man marbles wafting off of you this year. 929 00:37:24,983 --> 00:37:27,301 I did not enjoy doing that, Sue. 930 00:37:27,352 --> 00:37:28,769 Oh, I'm not talking about that. 931 00:37:28,820 --> 00:37:30,821 I'm talking about your little pixie dust hate crime. 932 00:37:30,906 --> 00:37:33,274 You know, it took Becky three hours to pick the glitter 933 00:37:33,325 --> 00:37:34,909 from my scalp like a little chimp. 934 00:37:34,976 --> 00:37:36,026 Good. 935 00:37:36,111 --> 00:37:37,144 I hope it taught you a lesson. 936 00:37:37,195 --> 00:37:38,329 It did, Will. 937 00:37:38,413 --> 00:37:40,998 It taught me that everyone loves a martyr. 938 00:37:41,082 --> 00:37:43,751 The day after your little video went up on YouTube, 939 00:37:43,818 --> 00:37:46,170 I went up seven points in the polls. 940 00:37:46,254 --> 00:37:49,957 Turns out, your hate is a lot like high-octane Sue-fluid. 941 00:37:50,008 --> 00:37:51,258 (snaps fingers) 942 00:37:51,326 --> 00:37:53,660 (bell ringing) 943 00:37:53,712 --> 00:37:56,764 Ladies and gentlemen, let's hear it for 944 00:37:56,831 --> 00:37:57,848 Glee Club's newest member, 945 00:37:57,933 --> 00:37:59,016 Blaine Anderson. 946 00:37:59,100 --> 00:38:00,100 Thanks so much, everyone. 947 00:38:00,168 --> 00:38:01,385 I'm so thrilled to be here. 948 00:38:01,469 --> 00:38:03,170 It's gonna be a great year, I can feel it. 949 00:38:03,221 --> 00:38:04,838 We're all gonna go to Nationals. 950 00:38:04,890 --> 00:38:06,473 (cheering) Yeah. 951 00:38:08,944 --> 00:38:11,028 Is there a problem, guys? 952 00:38:11,146 --> 00:38:14,514 I just want Blaine to know that we're not the Warblers. 953 00:38:14,566 --> 00:38:17,451 You know, we're not into the bells and whistles 954 00:38:17,518 --> 00:38:19,320 or the ball hogging, you know? 955 00:38:19,371 --> 00:38:21,121 I'm sorry, did I do something wrong? 956 00:38:21,189 --> 00:38:23,657 Well, yeah, you set a bonfire in our courtyard. 957 00:38:23,708 --> 00:38:26,460 Actually, Doorknob, that was an act of political protest. 958 00:38:26,527 --> 00:38:29,163 Which leads me to the next order of business. 959 00:38:29,214 --> 00:38:31,549 Santana, you need to leave. 960 00:38:31,633 --> 00:38:34,385 It was you and the Cheerios! who set fire to our piano. 961 00:38:34,469 --> 00:38:35,302 How could you do that? 962 00:38:35,370 --> 00:38:37,004 Mr. Shue, Sue made me. 963 00:38:37,055 --> 00:38:38,088 Brittany didn't do it. 964 00:38:38,173 --> 00:38:39,473 Well, yeah, I was gonna help, 965 00:38:39,540 --> 00:38:41,508 but I don't know, I'm a water sign, so... 966 00:38:42,677 --> 00:38:44,261 You're banned from Glee. 967 00:38:44,346 --> 00:38:46,897 Don't come back unless you can be as loyal to this club 968 00:38:46,982 --> 00:38:48,766 as the rest of the people in this room. 969 00:38:53,855 --> 00:38:55,072 You know what? 970 00:38:55,156 --> 00:38:56,223 I could use a break. 971 00:39:02,864 --> 00:39:04,231 You know, good for you, Mr. Shue. 972 00:39:04,282 --> 00:39:07,284 It's about time we got some allegiance up in here. 973 00:39:07,369 --> 00:39:09,336 I said it before and I will say it again-- 974 00:39:09,404 --> 00:39:12,206 we want to win Nationals this year, we need to be united. 975 00:39:12,257 --> 00:39:13,540 Rachel, you had an announcement? 976 00:39:13,592 --> 00:39:15,793 Yeah. 977 00:39:15,877 --> 00:39:17,962 Um, after pushing the envelope last year, I strongly believe 978 00:39:18,046 --> 00:39:19,380 that we should secure the rights to 979 00:39:19,431 --> 00:39:20,931 a, shall we say, 980 00:39:21,016 --> 00:39:23,384 less controversial show for our school musical. 981 00:39:23,435 --> 00:39:25,302 Wait for it. 982 00:39:25,387 --> 00:39:26,437 West Side Story. 983 00:39:26,521 --> 00:39:28,305 Is that the one with the cats? 984 00:39:28,390 --> 00:39:29,640 And it just so happens to have 985 00:39:29,724 --> 00:39:30,941 a lead role that showcases 986 00:39:31,026 --> 00:39:33,160 my talent and essence perfectly: Maria. 987 00:39:33,228 --> 00:39:34,094 MERCEDES: For which there will be 988 00:39:34,145 --> 00:39:35,696 open auditions, right? 989 00:39:35,763 --> 00:39:38,532 Because Mercedes is feeling extremely pretty this year. 990 00:39:38,599 --> 00:39:41,201 Kurt, you had something, too, right? 991 00:39:41,269 --> 00:39:43,070 Kurt Hummel is wading into 992 00:39:43,121 --> 00:39:45,605 McKinley High's shark- infested political waters 993 00:39:45,657 --> 00:39:46,957 and ruing for senior class president. 994 00:39:47,042 --> 00:39:49,209 All right, I thank you in advance for your votes. 995 00:39:49,277 --> 00:39:50,327 Okay. 996 00:39:50,412 --> 00:39:52,997 So much excitement. Now let's rehearse. 997 00:39:53,081 --> 00:39:56,016 Look at what they did to us, Mr. Shue. 998 00:39:56,084 --> 00:39:58,602 Just like these purple pianos, they ripped out our guts, 999 00:39:58,670 --> 00:40:01,221 threw crap all over us and burned us up. 1000 00:40:01,289 --> 00:40:04,808 Yeah. We got hit pretty hard. 1001 00:40:04,893 --> 00:40:06,760 But... 1002 00:40:06,811 --> 00:40:09,513 (plays three notes) 1003 00:40:09,597 --> 00:40:11,131 ...these pianos are still making music. 1004 00:40:11,182 --> 00:40:13,300 And so are we. 1005 00:40:13,351 --> 00:40:17,905 Mr. Shue, as always, you and I are on the exact same page. 1006 00:40:22,243 --> 00:40:24,194 (piano playing "You Can't Stop the Beat") 1007 00:40:24,279 --> 00:40:28,248 ♪ You can't stop an avalanche ♪ 1008 00:40:28,316 --> 00:40:33,420 ♪ As it races down the hill ♪ 1009 00:40:33,488 --> 00:40:37,174 ♪ You can try to stop the seasons ♪ 1010 00:40:37,258 --> 00:40:42,846 ♪ But you know you never will ♪ 1011 00:40:42,931 --> 00:40:48,052 ♪ And you can try to stop my dancing feet ♪ 1012 00:40:48,136 --> 00:40:52,022 ♪ But I just cannot stand still ♪ 1013 00:40:52,107 --> 00:40:57,194 ♪ 'Cause the world keeps spinning round and round ♪ 1014 00:40:57,278 --> 00:41:02,783 ♪ And my heart's keeping time to the speed of sound ♪ 1015 00:41:02,850 --> 00:41:04,902 ♪ I was lost till I heard the drums ♪ 1016 00:41:04,986 --> 00:41:09,206 ♪ Then I found my way ♪ 1017 00:41:09,290 --> 00:41:14,294 ♪ 'Cause you can't stop the beat ♪ 1018 00:41:14,362 --> 00:41:16,029 Five, six, seven, eight! 1019 00:41:16,081 --> 00:41:18,532 ♪ Ever since this old world began ♪ 1020 00:41:18,583 --> 00:41:21,802 ♪ A woman found out if she shook it, she could shake up a man ♪ 1021 00:41:21,869 --> 00:41:23,170 ♪ And so I'm gonna shake and shimmy it ♪ 1022 00:41:23,221 --> 00:41:25,973 ♪ The best that I can today ♪ 1023 00:41:26,040 --> 00:41:27,541 ♪ 'Cause you can't stop ♪ 1024 00:41:27,592 --> 00:41:29,643 ♪ The motion of the ocean or the sun in the sky ♪ 1025 00:41:29,710 --> 00:41:32,646 ♪ You can wonder if you wanna, but I never ask why ♪ 1026 00:41:32,713 --> 00:41:34,381 ♪ If you try to hold me down ♪ 1027 00:41:34,432 --> 00:41:37,067 ♪ I'm gonna spit in your eye and say ♪ 1028 00:41:37,152 --> 00:41:39,386 ♪ That you can't stop the beat ♪ 1029 00:41:46,945 --> 00:41:48,779 ♪ You can't stop today ♪ ♪ No ♪ 1030 00:41:48,863 --> 00:41:51,615 ♪ As it comes speeding down the track ♪ 1031 00:41:51,699 --> 00:41:53,200 ♪ Ooh, child, yeah ♪ 1032 00:41:53,251 --> 00:41:55,252 ♪ Child, yesterday is history ♪ ♪ Be gone ♪ 1033 00:41:55,336 --> 00:41:58,288 ♪ And it's never coming back ♪ 1034 00:41:58,373 --> 00:42:01,341 ♪ 'Cause tomorrow is a brand-new day ♪ 1035 00:42:01,409 --> 00:42:03,743 ♪ And it don't know white from black ♪ ♪ Yeah ♪ 1036 00:42:03,795 --> 00:42:06,213 ♪ 'Cause the world keeps spinning round and round ♪ 1037 00:42:06,264 --> 00:42:08,766 ♪ And my heart's keeping time to the speed of sound ♪ 1038 00:42:08,850 --> 00:42:13,804 ♪ I was lost till I heard the drums, then I found my way ♪ 1039 00:42:13,888 --> 00:42:15,922 ♪ 'Cause you can't stop the beat ♪ 1040 00:42:15,974 --> 00:42:18,358 ♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪ 1041 00:42:18,426 --> 00:42:21,094 ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 1042 00:42:21,146 --> 00:42:23,564 ♪ Ever since we first saw the sun ♪ 1043 00:42:23,615 --> 00:42:26,533 ♪ A man and woman like to shake it when the day is done ♪ 1044 00:42:26,601 --> 00:42:27,985 ♪ So I'm gonna shake and shimmy it ♪ 1045 00:42:28,069 --> 00:42:30,770 ♪ And have some fun today ♪ 1046 00:42:30,822 --> 00:42:32,289 ♪ 'Cause you can't stop ♪ 1047 00:42:32,373 --> 00:42:34,491 ♪ The motion of the ocean or the rain from above ♪ 1048 00:42:34,576 --> 00:42:37,161 ♪ You can try to stop the paradise we're dreaming of ♪ 1049 00:42:37,245 --> 00:42:41,965 ♪ But you cannot stop the rhythm of two hearts in love to stay ♪ 1050 00:42:42,050 --> 00:42:43,383 ♪ You can't stop the beat ♪ 1051 00:42:43,451 --> 00:42:45,085 ♪ You can't stop the beat ♪ 1052 00:42:45,136 --> 00:42:46,553 ♪ You can't stop the beat ♪ 1053 00:42:46,621 --> 00:42:47,805 ♪ You can't stop the beat ♪ 1054 00:42:47,889 --> 00:42:50,757 ♪ You can't stop the beat ♪ 1055 00:42:50,809 --> 00:42:54,628 ♪ Yeah, yeah! ♪ 1056 00:42:54,679 --> 00:42:56,013 (song ends) 1057 00:42:56,097 --> 00:42:59,799 Synced By YesCool www.addic7ed.com 1058 00:42:59,851 --> 00:43:00,717 Yeah!