1 00:00:02,086 --> 00:00:03,044 Here's what you missed. 2 00:00:03,128 --> 00:00:05,004 Kurt's getting harassed and doesn't know what to do. 3 00:00:05,089 --> 00:00:07,715 - I'm gonna kill you. - Finn and Kurt got mad at each other... 4 00:00:07,800 --> 00:00:10,134 because Kurt had a crush on Finn, then Finn called him a nasty name. 5 00:00:10,219 --> 00:00:11,844 But it also wasn't cool that Kurt couldn't take a hint. 6 00:00:11,929 --> 00:00:13,846 And they're parents are dating, so it's a little awkward. 7 00:00:13,972 --> 00:00:15,932 Sam and Quinn are sort of dating. Sue sort of dated Rod Remington. 8 00:00:16,016 --> 00:00:19,018 You sunk my battleship, Rod, and you sunk it hard. 9 00:00:19,103 --> 00:00:21,354 Then she caught him cheating, so she's back on the market. 10 00:00:21,438 --> 00:00:23,564 That's what you missed on Glee. 11 00:00:23,649 --> 00:00:26,150 [School Bell Rings] 12 00:00:27,069 --> 00:00:28,611 Okay. 13 00:00:31,407 --> 00:00:32,865 Oh. 14 00:00:32,950 --> 00:00:35,868 What's going on? Is this one of those interventions, 'cause... 15 00:00:35,994 --> 00:00:39,330 If it is, it's for both of us. They bombarded me and forced me to bring them to you. 16 00:00:39,415 --> 00:00:40,456 - Come on. Tell 'em. - No, no. 17 00:00:40,541 --> 00:00:42,750 - We said in the car... - Come on, please. You. 18 00:00:42,835 --> 00:00:44,335 - Please. - All right. 19 00:00:44,420 --> 00:00:46,713 So, you know how I drive Carole to work every Tuesday? 20 00:00:46,797 --> 00:00:48,923 Well, today I drove here, 21 00:00:49,007 --> 00:00:52,427 and we snuck into that classroom where Kurt introduced us... 22 00:00:52,511 --> 00:00:54,846 very romantic of me, I might add, and I... 23 00:00:54,972 --> 00:00:56,639 He proposed! He proposed! Ah! 24 00:00:56,724 --> 00:00:58,433 - You stole the punch line! - [Mouths Word] 25 00:00:58,517 --> 00:01:00,685 - Come on. - Wow. This just happened? 26 00:01:00,769 --> 00:01:04,313 - Oh, Dad! - We wanted the two of you to be the first to know. 27 00:01:04,398 --> 00:01:07,316 Yeah, after the kids in that homeroom. Come on. Family hug. Ah? 28 00:01:07,401 --> 00:01:09,110 [Kurt] Okay. Come on. 29 00:01:09,194 --> 00:01:12,113 [Burt Growls Playfully] [Laughing] 30 00:01:12,239 --> 00:01:14,115 I'm so excited and... and nervous. Don't be. Don't be. 31 00:01:14,199 --> 00:01:16,117 - Okay. - Oh, my God. This is just what I needed. 32 00:01:16,201 --> 00:01:17,952 I will take care of it from here. 33 00:01:18,036 --> 00:01:20,705 I have a trunk full of wedding magazines hidden under my bed. 34 00:01:20,789 --> 00:01:23,249 I'm thinking of a russet and cognac theme. 35 00:01:23,333 --> 00:01:25,626 Those are colors, Finn. Fall wedding colors. Autumnal. 36 00:01:25,711 --> 00:01:28,588 Nothing too extravagant, Kurt. Okay? We're gonna use whatever savings we have. 37 00:01:28,672 --> 00:01:31,466 We are spending it on the honeymoon. That's right. We're going to Waikiki. 38 00:01:31,550 --> 00:01:33,843 We're gonna go to the hotel where they put up the guest stars on Lost. 39 00:01:33,927 --> 00:01:36,262 Finn, you... you haven't said anything. 40 00:01:36,346 --> 00:01:39,515 Uh, I... I guess I'm just kind of stunned. 41 00:01:39,600 --> 00:01:41,726 [Burt] Hey. Don't worry. I'm already looking for a bigger house... 42 00:01:41,810 --> 00:01:43,811 one where everybody's gonna get their own rooms, all right? 43 00:01:43,896 --> 00:01:45,897 Come on, honey. Be happy for me. 44 00:01:48,066 --> 00:01:50,401 - I am, Mom. - [Burt] All right. Now listen. 45 00:01:50,486 --> 00:01:52,779 Kurt, Mr. Wedding Planner, I want you to take care of one thing. 46 00:01:52,863 --> 00:01:54,864 I don't care about the food or the booze at this party, 47 00:01:54,948 --> 00:01:56,866 but I want one heck of a band. 48 00:01:56,950 --> 00:01:58,910 I've been eating right, I have been exercising, 49 00:01:58,994 --> 00:02:01,287 and I want to boogie with Carole at this wedding. 50 00:02:01,371 --> 00:02:03,164 - Oh! [Laughs] - And I will boogie. 51 00:02:03,248 --> 00:02:05,124 All right. It's already taken care of, Dad. 52 00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:09,128 I'm gonna hire the New Directions as your band. Right? It won't cost you a cent. 53 00:02:09,213 --> 00:02:10,880 They're cheap. They're available. 54 00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:12,590 Long story short, 55 00:02:12,674 --> 00:02:14,383 you're having a Glee wedding. 56 00:02:18,096 --> 00:02:20,765 [Thinking] Today is a red-letter day. 57 00:02:20,849 --> 00:02:24,435 The big day has finally arrived for one Sue Sylvester. 58 00:02:24,520 --> 00:02:29,065 Becky, get in here! Get these invites down to the post office stat. 59 00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:31,359 Got it, Coach. 60 00:02:31,443 --> 00:02:35,988 And to think that this joyous occasion began in horror. 61 00:02:36,073 --> 00:02:40,117 ...which is why I just prefer to think of the homeless as outdoorsy. 62 00:02:40,202 --> 00:02:43,788 So, shine on, urban campers. You smell like adventure. 63 00:02:43,872 --> 00:02:46,290 And that's how Sue "C's" it. 64 00:02:46,375 --> 00:02:48,960 Sue, you're the bee's knees. 65 00:02:49,044 --> 00:02:51,295 Before we break, I'd like to make an announcement. 66 00:02:51,380 --> 00:02:54,257 Rod and I are engaged. [Chuckles] 67 00:02:54,341 --> 00:02:58,803 I popped the question in my building's common-use hot tub. "Bool-yah." 68 00:02:58,887 --> 00:03:01,472 Not to worry, ladies. It's an open marriage. 69 00:03:01,598 --> 00:03:03,516 We'll be right back. [Bell Rings] 70 00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:07,186 How dare you humiliate me like that. People know you and I dated. 71 00:03:07,271 --> 00:03:10,606 Sue, you can't tame the tiger. 72 00:03:10,691 --> 00:03:12,817 - You've read my tattoos. - [Andrea] Face it, Sue. 73 00:03:12,901 --> 00:03:15,736 You're never gonna find someone, and you're gonna die alone. 74 00:03:17,447 --> 00:03:20,867 [Sue] So I decided to try online dating. 75 00:03:22,911 --> 00:03:25,621 - [Chimes] - There was only one match for Sue Sylvester. 76 00:03:26,498 --> 00:03:28,165 [Chimes] 77 00:03:28,250 --> 00:03:30,293 One Sue Sylvester. 78 00:03:30,377 --> 00:03:32,211 ♪ Be my Be my baby ♪ 79 00:03:32,296 --> 00:03:35,715 [Thinking] So, thanks, eDesperate. I'm over the moon. 80 00:03:35,799 --> 00:03:38,009 Or maybe I'm a little high off this adhesive. 81 00:03:38,093 --> 00:03:40,761 But I want to scream from the highest mountain... 82 00:03:40,846 --> 00:03:44,181 Sue Sylvester is marrying herself. 83 00:03:44,266 --> 00:03:46,559 ♪ My one and only baby ♪♪ 84 00:03:46,643 --> 00:03:47,643 [School Bell Rings] 85 00:03:47,728 --> 00:03:49,395 Hey. 86 00:03:49,479 --> 00:03:51,522 Is that safe... with your shoulder messed up and all? 87 00:03:51,648 --> 00:03:55,401 Doesn't feel messed up to me. Now that I'm healthy, I'm gonna be gunning to get my job back. 88 00:03:55,485 --> 00:03:58,446 Well, Coach Beiste isn't gonna replace me while we're winning. 89 00:03:58,530 --> 00:04:01,115 You can't win every game. Look. I still want to be friends. 90 00:04:01,199 --> 00:04:05,328 It's just I'm kind of on the cusp of being one of the most popular guys in school. 91 00:04:05,412 --> 00:04:08,998 Wow. I, uh... I didn't think you were the type that cared about that stuff. 92 00:04:09,082 --> 00:04:12,710 Everyone does. Being on top means you don't have to take crap from anybody. 93 00:04:12,794 --> 00:04:15,212 No teasing, no Slushee facials. 94 00:04:15,297 --> 00:04:18,257 Being quarterback isn't gonna put you on top, 95 00:04:18,342 --> 00:04:21,177 especially since you can't even get Quinn to be your girlfriend. 96 00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:23,220 I'm working on that too. 97 00:04:31,855 --> 00:04:34,190 [Quinn] So, what do you want to talk about in private? 98 00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:38,110 These galactic mobiles aren't the stars of McKinley. 99 00:04:38,195 --> 00:04:39,278 We are. 100 00:04:39,404 --> 00:04:42,573 Or at least I want us to be. Okay. 101 00:04:43,408 --> 00:04:45,117 I think I love you. 102 00:04:45,202 --> 00:04:48,204 Oh. [Chuckles] 103 00:04:48,288 --> 00:04:51,290 Look. My shoulder's healed. I'm gonna be the quarterback again soon. 104 00:04:51,375 --> 00:04:53,751 You're already the head cheerleader. 105 00:04:55,128 --> 00:04:56,671 Oh, my God. Are you proposing? 106 00:04:56,755 --> 00:04:58,714 We've known each other for six weeks. 107 00:04:58,840 --> 00:05:02,635 Stand up. You're freaking me out. I want to marry you... someday. 108 00:05:02,719 --> 00:05:05,596 Until then, will you accept this promise ring? 109 00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:08,516 What are you, six? 110 00:05:08,600 --> 00:05:10,685 If you accept, 111 00:05:10,769 --> 00:05:13,980 this ring will symbolize my promise to you to be true, 112 00:05:14,064 --> 00:05:17,483 to never pressure you to do anything more than kiss, 113 00:05:17,567 --> 00:05:22,029 to listen to your problems, to tell you when you have food in your teeth, or eye gunk, 114 00:05:22,114 --> 00:05:24,949 to come over to your house whenever you need something superheavy moved around. 115 00:05:25,033 --> 00:05:30,871 I promise to make you feel proud when you point down the hall... 116 00:05:30,956 --> 00:05:33,332 and say "That dude's my boyfriend." 117 00:05:33,417 --> 00:05:35,793 I promise to do all of those things... 118 00:05:35,877 --> 00:05:38,421 without ever trying to sound like Matthew McConaughey. 119 00:05:43,760 --> 00:05:45,928 I really care about you, Quinn, 120 00:05:47,097 --> 00:05:49,098 and I want us to be together. 121 00:05:55,272 --> 00:05:56,772 Is that a no? 122 00:05:57,983 --> 00:05:59,483 It's a maybe. 123 00:06:05,449 --> 00:06:06,657 [Sighs] 124 00:06:06,742 --> 00:06:08,659 [School Bell Rings] 125 00:06:11,246 --> 00:06:15,249 Hey. Uh, so, I've been reviewing this itinerary, and I don't really get it. 126 00:06:15,333 --> 00:06:17,376 Are you sure we should release 300 live doves indoors? 127 00:06:17,461 --> 00:06:19,336 Won't that get kind of messy? 128 00:06:19,421 --> 00:06:21,589 That's why we feed them glitter, Finn. 129 00:06:21,673 --> 00:06:24,383 Oh. Well, look. 130 00:06:24,468 --> 00:06:27,303 I've been thinking about it. I really want to do something special for the wedding, 131 00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:30,598 and I want to take this opportunity to sort of remind everyone... 132 00:06:30,682 --> 00:06:33,184 that I'm, you know, a leader. 133 00:06:33,268 --> 00:06:35,186 I have the perfect idea. 134 00:06:35,270 --> 00:06:37,855 After you walk your mom down the aisle and give her away to my dad... 135 00:06:37,939 --> 00:06:39,440 Incredibly creepy. 136 00:06:39,524 --> 00:06:41,650 And give your speech to the newlyweds, which I will write, 137 00:06:41,735 --> 00:06:43,652 although you are free to suggest overall themes, 138 00:06:43,737 --> 00:06:46,363 you and Carole will have a lovely mother-and-son dance in front of everyone. 139 00:06:46,448 --> 00:06:49,533 That's a terrible idea. Everybody knows I'm the worst dancer. 140 00:06:49,618 --> 00:06:52,119 Finn, trust me on this. I have been planning weddings since I was two. 141 00:06:52,204 --> 00:06:54,038 My Power Rangers got married and divorced... 142 00:06:54,122 --> 00:06:56,207 in so many combinations, they were like Fleetwood Mac. 143 00:06:56,291 --> 00:07:00,252 I guess if I could pull it off, it would make me seem like a cool stud. 144 00:07:00,337 --> 00:07:01,504 Totally. 145 00:07:01,588 --> 00:07:03,756 Thanks. It's a plan. 146 00:07:12,349 --> 00:07:14,308 I don't want you near me. 147 00:07:26,154 --> 00:07:28,072 Can I have this? 148 00:07:29,950 --> 00:07:31,534 Thanks. 149 00:07:36,957 --> 00:07:38,916 Are you okay? 150 00:07:41,211 --> 00:07:43,546 No. Let's go to the principal. Come on. 151 00:07:43,630 --> 00:07:45,172 [School Bell Rings] 152 00:07:45,257 --> 00:07:47,883 Did he physically hurt you? 153 00:07:47,968 --> 00:07:50,219 - No. - You said he shoved you into the lockers before. 154 00:07:50,303 --> 00:07:52,221 I can't expel a kid for shoving. He'll just say, 155 00:07:52,305 --> 00:07:54,056 "I didn't mean to shove that kid. I tripped." 156 00:07:54,141 --> 00:07:56,225 Excuse works like a charm. I use it all the time. 157 00:07:56,309 --> 00:07:59,728 He didn't shove me this time. He just terrified me. 158 00:07:59,813 --> 00:08:03,274 Lady, I can't suspend a student because he scares you. 159 00:08:03,358 --> 00:08:06,402 High school is a dry run for the rest of your life. 160 00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:08,737 It's rough. People can be mean. 161 00:08:08,822 --> 00:08:11,198 That's your advice? That's all you have to say? 162 00:08:11,283 --> 00:08:13,492 William, I was bullied my entire life. 163 00:08:13,577 --> 00:08:15,870 I grew up with a "handicapable" sister. 164 00:08:15,954 --> 00:08:18,706 I know very well how cruel people can be. 165 00:08:18,790 --> 00:08:22,626 Was it difficult? Yes. Did it make me stronger? 166 00:08:22,711 --> 00:08:25,880 - You bet it did. - It's the fear that's the worst. 167 00:08:25,964 --> 00:08:28,465 I never know when it's coming. I can't concentrate. 168 00:08:28,550 --> 00:08:31,802 I don't feel like I'm part of the school at all. I feel like I'm in a horror movie... 169 00:08:31,887 --> 00:08:33,804 where this creature follows me around terrifying me, 170 00:08:33,889 --> 00:08:35,723 and there's nothing that I can do about it? 171 00:08:35,807 --> 00:08:39,268 I mean, you... you don't know what's going on in this kid's head. 172 00:08:39,352 --> 00:08:41,228 You don't know what he's capable of. 173 00:08:43,773 --> 00:08:46,859 - What does that mean? - Nothing. Maybe I'm overreacting. 174 00:08:46,943 --> 00:08:49,570 Lady, this kid lays a finger on you, 175 00:08:49,654 --> 00:08:51,822 you come straight to me, and I will expel him... 176 00:08:51,907 --> 00:08:55,242 faster than a Thai takeout place can read back your delivery order. 177 00:08:55,327 --> 00:09:00,289 Okay? But until that happens... and I'm genuinely sorry to say this... 178 00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:03,125 there's nothing legally I or the school board can do. 179 00:09:04,878 --> 00:09:06,879 Come on, Kurt. We're gonna be late for rehearsal. 180 00:09:11,635 --> 00:09:15,554 You know, when you call me "lady"...that's bullying. And it's really hurtful. 181 00:09:15,639 --> 00:09:17,598 I'm sorry. I thought that was your name. 182 00:09:17,682 --> 00:09:20,893 As an apology, I'll allow you to choose from the following nicknames: 183 00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:24,688 Gelfling, Porcelain and Tickle-Me-Doughface. 184 00:09:25,941 --> 00:09:27,775 - I guess I'll go with Porcelain. - Damn. 185 00:09:27,859 --> 00:09:30,194 Totally wanted Tickle-Me-Doughface. 186 00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:35,741 Ladies, the Kurt/Karofsky bullying situation is getting way out of control. 187 00:09:35,825 --> 00:09:38,744 Kurt's miserable. He's losing weight- and not in a good way... 188 00:09:38,828 --> 00:09:40,871 and he's barely even fighting me for solos anymore. 189 00:09:40,997 --> 00:09:43,791 We've all been teased, but something about what Karofsky's doing is so much worse. 190 00:09:43,875 --> 00:09:46,210 We're all lucky enough to have boyfriends on the football team. 191 00:09:46,294 --> 00:09:49,046 I say we band together and demand that they confront Karofsky. 192 00:09:49,130 --> 00:09:51,590 Okay. First off all, I'm not dating Sam. And second of all, 193 00:09:51,675 --> 00:09:54,468 I think you personally just set the feminist movement back 50 years. 194 00:09:54,552 --> 00:09:56,387 But guys like Karofsky only respond to muscle. 195 00:09:56,471 --> 00:09:58,305 So we're gonna fight violence with violence? 196 00:09:58,390 --> 00:10:01,183 No. Look. I'm not saying that they should hit him. 197 00:10:01,268 --> 00:10:04,603 What I'm saying is that we need to defend Kurt, and there's strength in numbers. 198 00:10:04,688 --> 00:10:07,690 I'm confused. Are you and Artie officially dating now? 199 00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:09,400 Deal with it. 200 00:10:09,484 --> 00:10:13,112 When you guys fooled around, did he ever, like, just lie there? 201 00:10:13,196 --> 00:10:15,948 Why didn't you tell me that we were having a Glee girls meeting? 202 00:10:16,032 --> 00:10:17,866 This is a meeting for Glee girls with boyfriends. 203 00:10:17,951 --> 00:10:20,244 We're gonna make them stop Karofsky from bullying Kurt. 204 00:10:20,328 --> 00:10:22,746 - Okay, I'm dating Puckerman. - You're getting naked with Puckerman. 205 00:10:22,831 --> 00:10:25,457 Besides, Puck can't mess with Karofsky. He's on probation. 206 00:10:25,542 --> 00:10:28,252 - If he gets in a fight with him, he'll be sent back to juvie. - Mm-hmm. 207 00:10:28,336 --> 00:10:30,004 Yeah. So now, if you'll excuse us. 208 00:10:30,088 --> 00:10:33,048 [Scoffs] You're so on my list, dwarf. 209 00:10:34,050 --> 00:10:36,635 Look. If something bad happens to Kurt, 210 00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:38,637 and we didn't do anything to stop it, 211 00:10:38,722 --> 00:10:40,639 we'll never be able to live with ourselves. 212 00:10:40,724 --> 00:10:41,932 [School Bell Rings] 213 00:10:42,017 --> 00:10:43,392 I'm a little confused. 214 00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:45,769 I said not only am I marrying myself, 215 00:10:45,854 --> 00:10:47,730 I will be officiating the ceremony. 216 00:10:47,856 --> 00:10:49,565 I'm not, um... Marcia Dean, 217 00:10:49,649 --> 00:10:52,735 when I hired you and your crack team at Marcia Dean Weddings, 218 00:10:52,819 --> 00:10:55,612 I did so because you specialize in unique weddings. 219 00:10:55,697 --> 00:10:58,615 Well, that mostly means that some of them take place outside. 220 00:10:58,700 --> 00:11:01,535 Marcia Dean, you are fired. You are out of your depth. 221 00:11:01,619 --> 00:11:03,996 And nothing is too good for Sue Sylvester. 222 00:11:04,080 --> 00:11:05,998 Well, that's one way to look at it. 223 00:11:06,082 --> 00:11:08,000 Hello. 224 00:11:08,084 --> 00:11:11,003 I'm Doris Sylvester. I'm this one's mother. 225 00:11:11,087 --> 00:11:15,257 Marcia, I'll bet people say you look mannish. But you know something? 226 00:11:15,342 --> 00:11:18,886 I think it's perfectly all right for a woman to be handsome. 227 00:11:21,765 --> 00:11:23,557 Takes all kinds. 228 00:11:23,641 --> 00:11:26,810 Susie. Come give your mother a hug. 229 00:11:28,104 --> 00:11:30,814 - Please don't call me that. - Come on. Come on. 230 00:11:30,899 --> 00:11:33,025 [Chuckles] Oh. 231 00:11:33,109 --> 00:11:34,068 Ow! 232 00:11:34,152 --> 00:11:37,279 You poked me in my sternum. 233 00:11:37,364 --> 00:11:42,242 I always forget that you have this rib cage that's kind of weird... and adorable. 234 00:11:42,327 --> 00:11:45,120 Think I'll sit down. [Sighs, Chuckles] 235 00:11:45,205 --> 00:11:46,955 Mom, what are you doing here? 236 00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:48,791 Good news, Suze. 237 00:11:48,875 --> 00:11:51,085 We finally caught the last Nazi. 238 00:11:51,169 --> 00:11:54,129 For two and a half years, we've been hot on the trail... 239 00:11:54,214 --> 00:11:57,174 of Eva Braun's great-nephew Chad. 240 00:11:57,258 --> 00:11:59,843 And you know what? He's been under our noses this whole time, 241 00:11:59,928 --> 00:12:03,472 working in Phoenix as a C.P.A. [Chuckles] 242 00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:06,517 Ah, I felt bad taking him out. 243 00:12:06,601 --> 00:12:08,685 I mean, it's punishment enough to live there. 244 00:12:08,770 --> 00:12:10,729 Have you ever been to Phoenix? It's a hellhole. 245 00:12:10,814 --> 00:12:12,523 Mom, where have you been? 246 00:12:12,607 --> 00:12:14,858 I haven't seen you or heard from you in over three years. 247 00:12:14,943 --> 00:12:17,694 What do you mean? I-I wrote you all those postcards. 248 00:12:17,779 --> 00:12:19,822 I mean, granted, they were decoys. 249 00:12:19,906 --> 00:12:23,409 - Have you been to see Jean yet? - It's the top of my list. 250 00:12:23,493 --> 00:12:25,828 Look. I, uh... 251 00:12:25,912 --> 00:12:28,497 I know it's been a long time, but... 252 00:12:28,581 --> 00:12:30,833 the work I was doing was important. 253 00:12:30,917 --> 00:12:33,794 And I always wanted to get back here and... 254 00:12:33,878 --> 00:12:36,547 be a mother to you girls again. 255 00:12:36,631 --> 00:12:40,926 But, Susie, I have to ask you, what is it with this ridiculous wedding? 256 00:12:41,010 --> 00:12:43,512 - Have you given up on love? - No, Mother. Quite the opposite. 257 00:12:43,638 --> 00:12:47,558 When you were little, the other mothers used to tell me that you'd never find anybody, 258 00:12:47,642 --> 00:12:50,519 but I said, "No, no, no, no. 259 00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:52,813 She's a perfectly okay child. 260 00:12:52,897 --> 00:12:54,815 She'll grow into her looks." 261 00:12:54,899 --> 00:12:57,276 And you know what? 262 00:12:57,360 --> 00:12:58,986 I believe you still might. 263 00:12:59,070 --> 00:13:00,988 Mother, I am going through with this wedding, 264 00:13:01,072 --> 00:13:03,115 and you are free to accept the invitation or not. 265 00:13:03,241 --> 00:13:05,159 Are you inviting me? I'm inviting you now. 266 00:13:05,243 --> 00:13:07,911 Well, I'm accepting. Don't get so huffy. 267 00:13:08,037 --> 00:13:13,167 But since your father's no longer with us, I want to walk you down the aisle. 268 00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:17,421 No. I'm doing that. Then I know exactly what I'm going to do. 269 00:13:17,547 --> 00:13:22,426 Do you remember when you were a little girl, and you used to ask me to sing to you? 270 00:13:22,510 --> 00:13:25,929 I... I never had the time. So you'd line up your little dollies... 271 00:13:26,014 --> 00:13:27,931 and they'd sing to each other. 272 00:13:28,016 --> 00:13:30,309 Appalachian murder ballads. 273 00:13:30,393 --> 00:13:32,352 But it was touching. 274 00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:35,522 Do you know something though? 275 00:13:35,607 --> 00:13:38,650 I'm going to be there for you this time. 276 00:13:38,735 --> 00:13:40,777 I'm going to sing at your wedding. 277 00:13:42,113 --> 00:13:44,072 But why? Karofsky plays right guard. 278 00:13:44,157 --> 00:13:47,117 If he gets pissed at me, I'm gonna get sacked more times than Jay Cutler, 279 00:13:47,202 --> 00:13:50,204 which means we're gonna lose, which means Beiste is gonna make Sam quarterback. 280 00:13:50,288 --> 00:13:52,206 Is being quarterback more important to you... 281 00:13:52,290 --> 00:13:54,374 than helping out the kid who's gonna be your stepbrother? 282 00:13:54,459 --> 00:13:58,545 Look. We both know I can help him more if I stay on top. Kurt's gonna be fine. 283 00:13:58,630 --> 00:14:02,424 Rachel, I'm sorry. I want to, but I can't. 284 00:14:02,509 --> 00:14:05,969 I've never been so disappointed in you before. 285 00:14:06,054 --> 00:14:07,554 But- 286 00:14:08,431 --> 00:14:10,641 [School Bell Rings] 287 00:14:12,393 --> 00:14:15,187 - Stop picking on Kurt. - Do you mind? I'm changing. 288 00:14:15,271 --> 00:14:17,606 We're serious. 289 00:14:17,690 --> 00:14:19,608 - This is a warning. - Oh, yeah? 290 00:14:19,692 --> 00:14:22,528 - From now on, you're gonna leave him alone. - Look. 291 00:14:22,612 --> 00:14:26,782 If he wants to be a homo, that's up to him, but don't rub it in my face. 292 00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:30,702 - We're not asking you. - Yeah. We're done talking about this. 293 00:14:30,828 --> 00:14:33,330 Just back off, all right? Look. You back off! 294 00:14:33,414 --> 00:14:34,706 Hey! 295 00:14:34,791 --> 00:14:36,625 Artie, you okay? 296 00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:37,960 Ow! 297 00:14:39,420 --> 00:14:40,712 [Groans] 298 00:14:40,797 --> 00:14:42,965 [Grunts] 299 00:14:43,049 --> 00:14:45,384 Hey, hey, hey! What's going on? Get up! 300 00:14:45,468 --> 00:14:47,678 Get up here! Get up! 301 00:14:48,805 --> 00:14:51,515 What the hell's going on here? 302 00:14:54,644 --> 00:14:56,436 [School Bell Rings] 303 00:14:56,521 --> 00:14:58,522 - Dude was a wild animal. - "Manimal." 304 00:14:58,606 --> 00:14:59,940 I'm so turned on by you right now. 305 00:15:00,066 --> 00:15:02,484 How bad does it look? It's pretty hot, actually. 306 00:15:02,569 --> 00:15:05,237 You have no idea how hard it was not to jump into that beat-down. 307 00:15:05,321 --> 00:15:07,614 - Where were you, Finn? - I was still out on the field, okay? 308 00:15:07,699 --> 00:15:09,783 I totally would have given him a beat-down if I'd been there. 309 00:15:09,867 --> 00:15:12,077 The fact is, it shouldn't have gone down without you, Finn. 310 00:15:12,161 --> 00:15:13,912 You should have been leading the charge. 311 00:15:13,997 --> 00:15:16,331 Lay off Finn, everyone. It isn't his problem. 312 00:15:16,416 --> 00:15:18,292 It's none of your problems, actually. 313 00:15:18,376 --> 00:15:21,920 But thank you for what you did. Especially Sam. 314 00:15:22,005 --> 00:15:24,840 - Serious. An epitome of a leader. - [Will] What's going on? 315 00:15:24,924 --> 00:15:26,675 What happened to Sam's eye? 316 00:15:26,801 --> 00:15:29,136 He stood up to Karofsky. [Tina] All the guys did. 317 00:15:29,220 --> 00:15:30,929 Well, not Finn. 318 00:15:31,014 --> 00:15:34,141 Is everyone okay? Do we all need to go talk to Principal Sylvester? 319 00:15:34,225 --> 00:15:37,978 No. I got in a few good licks too, so we can just call it even. 320 00:15:38,062 --> 00:15:41,565 And maybe this will send a warning to Karofsky, telling him to back off Kurt. 321 00:15:42,859 --> 00:15:44,985 You okay, Kurt? 322 00:15:45,111 --> 00:15:49,406 All right, guys. Let's take our places. We got a wedding to prepare for. 323 00:15:50,742 --> 00:15:53,035 [School Bell Rings] 324 00:15:53,119 --> 00:15:56,288 Well, Mr. Piano Man, I think I owe you an apology. 325 00:15:56,372 --> 00:15:58,457 Not to worry, Susie-Q. 326 00:15:58,541 --> 00:16:00,751 I arranged for us to spend an hour in here... 327 00:16:00,835 --> 00:16:04,129 with that, uh... that cutie pie... what's his... handsome guy... 328 00:16:04,255 --> 00:16:05,964 What's his name? Will Schuester? 329 00:16:06,090 --> 00:16:08,050 Phew! Let's get this over with. 330 00:16:08,134 --> 00:16:09,635 Look. 331 00:16:09,719 --> 00:16:13,096 I know you've always resented my leaving. 332 00:16:13,181 --> 00:16:16,391 But I don't think you ever truly appreciated... 333 00:16:16,476 --> 00:16:20,062 the sacrifices I made to be a famous Nazi hunter. 334 00:16:20,146 --> 00:16:23,940 I don't think you ever thought about how hard it was on me. 335 00:16:24,025 --> 00:16:28,570 So, this is the song I'm going to sing at your wedding. 336 00:16:28,655 --> 00:16:30,364 Yoo-hoo. Here we are. 337 00:16:30,448 --> 00:16:32,366 I know you know it. 338 00:16:32,450 --> 00:16:34,910 It's one of my favorites. 339 00:16:38,206 --> 00:16:39,665 Well, hit it. 340 00:16:39,749 --> 00:16:42,542 ♪♪ [Ballad] 341 00:16:45,588 --> 00:16:50,634 ♪ Why, oh, why, oh, why, oh ♪ 342 00:16:51,803 --> 00:16:57,891 ♪ Why did I ever leave Ohio ♪ 343 00:16:57,975 --> 00:17:03,522 ♪ Why did I wander to find what lies yonder ♪ 344 00:17:03,606 --> 00:17:10,445 ♪ When life was so cozy at home ♪ 345 00:17:10,530 --> 00:17:15,826 ♪ Wondering while I wander ♪ 346 00:17:16,619 --> 00:17:19,496 ♪ Why did I fly ♪ 347 00:17:19,580 --> 00:17:22,290 ♪ Why did I roam ♪ 348 00:17:23,126 --> 00:17:25,711 ♪ Oh, why, oh, why, oh ♪ 349 00:17:25,837 --> 00:17:29,089 ♪ Did I leave Ohio ♪ ♪ Did you leave Ohio ♪ 350 00:17:29,173 --> 00:17:32,801 ♪ Maybe I'd better go ♪ 351 00:17:32,927 --> 00:17:37,639 ♪ Home ♪ ♪ O-H-l-O ♪ 352 00:17:37,765 --> 00:17:42,394 ♪ Maybe I'd better go ♪ ♪ Maybe you'd better go ♪ 353 00:17:42,478 --> 00:17:47,649 ♪ Home ♪ 354 00:17:49,444 --> 00:17:53,405 Well, Mother, this song still doesn't explain why you abandoned your children. 355 00:17:53,489 --> 00:17:56,825 Ohio was stifling, and we couldn't wait to get out of the place. 356 00:17:56,909 --> 00:17:59,953 And I told you, "Sue, we're going to be hunting Nazis." 357 00:18:00,079 --> 00:18:02,539 And Pop said, "Sue, this might take a little while." ♪♪ [Continues] 358 00:18:02,623 --> 00:18:06,585 Well, those Nazis are slippery, and me hunting them way down in Lima, Peru. 359 00:18:06,669 --> 00:18:08,962 And we'd get postcards from Niagara Falls. 360 00:18:09,046 --> 00:18:11,548 While I'm stalking Mengele in Bolivian malls. 361 00:18:11,632 --> 00:18:14,593 Three times a year we'd get crackling phone calls. 362 00:18:14,719 --> 00:18:16,303 Happy birthday. "Hunting Nazis." 363 00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:18,263 Merry Christmas. "Hunting Nazis." 364 00:18:18,389 --> 00:18:19,848 Homesick. Abandoned. 365 00:18:19,974 --> 00:18:21,266 Heartsick. Neglected. 366 00:18:21,350 --> 00:18:25,896 ♪ Thank heavens we're free ♪ 367 00:18:28,274 --> 00:18:34,529 ♪ Why, oh, why, oh, why, oh ♪ 368 00:18:34,614 --> 00:18:40,202 ♪ Why did I ever leave Ohio ♪ 369 00:18:47,043 --> 00:18:49,753 ♪ Oh, why, oh, why, oh ♪ 370 00:18:49,879 --> 00:18:53,965 ♪ Did I leave Ohio ♪ ♪ Did you leave Ohio ♪ 371 00:18:54,050 --> 00:18:59,137 ♪ Maybe I'd better stay ♪ 372 00:18:59,222 --> 00:19:07,103 ♪ Home ♪♪ 373 00:19:13,986 --> 00:19:17,572 [Sniffs] Well, that wasn't as good as I thought it would be. 374 00:19:17,657 --> 00:19:21,660 We... Whoa. Wait a minute. I've got a fitting for your wedding. 375 00:19:21,744 --> 00:19:24,955 I'm wearing white. I know you won't mind. 376 00:19:25,039 --> 00:19:26,748 It goes with my skin tone. 377 00:19:26,833 --> 00:19:30,293 You... You've got your father's coloring. 378 00:19:30,378 --> 00:19:32,295 Give us a kiss. 379 00:19:35,299 --> 00:19:39,177 [Doris] ♪ Maybe I'd better stay home ♪ 380 00:19:39,262 --> 00:19:40,971 [School Bell Rings] 381 00:19:41,055 --> 00:19:43,807 Thank you both for attending the Kurt Hummel wedding dance seminar. 382 00:19:43,891 --> 00:19:46,434 Dad, you're gonna have to pull off the first dance with Carole. 383 00:19:46,519 --> 00:19:48,854 And if Uncle Andy's 40th birthday party was any indication, 384 00:19:48,938 --> 00:19:50,856 you're gonna need some work. 385 00:19:50,940 --> 00:19:54,067 What are you talking about? My moves were great. Okay? It was the damn sangria. 386 00:19:54,193 --> 00:19:56,736 Okay. We dance to the beat, not to the words. Affected my coordination. 387 00:19:56,863 --> 00:19:59,197 I'm here, right? Yes. Right here. Okay. 388 00:19:59,282 --> 00:20:01,533 All right. Have you guys chosen... No... a wedding song? 389 00:20:01,617 --> 00:20:04,035 Ah, yes. We're thinking "Stairway" or some Bublé. 390 00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:06,746 Okay. Great. So it's basically one, two, three, four. Okay. 391 00:20:06,873 --> 00:20:09,332 ♪♪ [Piano] Follow me. All right. Gentleman leads on the left. 392 00:20:09,458 --> 00:20:12,043 Right. Opposite of me. Okay? Get ready. Opposite. 393 00:20:12,128 --> 00:20:14,045 One, two, three, four. 394 00:20:14,130 --> 00:20:16,506 - Okay. Good. And back. - Look at me. I'm dancing, huh? 395 00:20:16,632 --> 00:20:18,133 Look at that. Yeah. Okay, okay. 396 00:20:18,217 --> 00:20:20,135 Come over here, and dance with yourself. Practice. 397 00:20:20,219 --> 00:20:23,263 Come on, Finn. No chickening out. I did it. You gotta do it too. 398 00:20:23,347 --> 00:20:25,432 [Exhales] Okay. Uh... 399 00:20:27,476 --> 00:20:29,394 - My feet are moving, and there's music. - All right. 400 00:20:29,478 --> 00:20:31,396 - Position. - [Burt] That's dancing. 401 00:20:31,480 --> 00:20:34,316 Can we shut the door? I'm not really comfortable with people watching. 402 00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:37,485 What are you talking about? You danced in front of a thousand people at regionals. 403 00:20:39,322 --> 00:20:41,239 Okay. 404 00:20:44,660 --> 00:20:46,202 ♪♪ [Stops] 405 00:20:46,287 --> 00:20:47,787 What the hell was that? 406 00:20:47,872 --> 00:20:49,748 - It's nothing, Dad. - That was not nothing. 407 00:20:49,832 --> 00:20:52,667 That guy was making fun of you. What the hell's his name? 408 00:20:52,752 --> 00:20:54,419 - Tell him, Kurt. - Tell me what? 409 00:20:54,503 --> 00:20:57,589 - Tell him, or I will. - His name's Dave Karofsky. 410 00:20:57,673 --> 00:21:00,091 He's been harassing me for a few weeks now. 411 00:21:00,176 --> 00:21:04,471 - Harassing you how? - Just shoving me and giving me a hard time. 412 00:21:04,555 --> 00:21:07,432 There's more. There's something else you're not telling me. 413 00:21:07,516 --> 00:21:08,850 He threatened to kill me. 414 00:21:10,269 --> 00:21:12,270 What? You gotta be kidding me. 415 00:21:12,355 --> 00:21:13,688 Burt! 416 00:21:14,774 --> 00:21:16,608 What the hell? You like picking on people? 417 00:21:16,692 --> 00:21:18,151 - What? - Why don't you try me. 418 00:21:18,235 --> 00:21:21,363 Burt, stop. Please, you're sick. Come on. 419 00:21:27,536 --> 00:21:30,705 What the hell have you been doing while this is all going on, huh? 420 00:21:33,376 --> 00:21:35,669 [School Bell Rings] 421 00:21:35,753 --> 00:21:38,213 So it seems the situation has reached a boiling point. 422 00:21:38,297 --> 00:21:40,131 - You're damn right it has. - Nothing happened. 423 00:21:40,216 --> 00:21:42,467 I'll tell you what really happened. Mr. Karofsky... 424 00:21:42,551 --> 00:21:45,887 - My name's Paul. - Paul, your kid threatened the life of my son. 425 00:21:47,348 --> 00:21:49,182 Porcelain, is that true? 426 00:21:49,266 --> 00:21:51,476 That's not true. I didn't say anything. 427 00:21:51,560 --> 00:21:54,729 That's what he said. He said he would kill me if I told anyone. 428 00:21:54,814 --> 00:21:56,815 If you told anyone what? 429 00:21:56,899 --> 00:22:00,652 Just... that he was picking on me. 430 00:22:00,736 --> 00:22:03,530 - [Sighs] He's making all this stuff up. - Oh, is that right? 431 00:22:03,614 --> 00:22:07,283 Hold on a sec. You have been acting differently lately, David. 432 00:22:07,368 --> 00:22:09,202 You used to get A's and B's. 433 00:22:09,286 --> 00:22:12,956 You're talking back, you're acting out, and now we're sitting here. 434 00:22:13,040 --> 00:22:15,417 So let me ask you, 435 00:22:16,210 --> 00:22:18,878 why would Kurt make that up? 436 00:22:18,963 --> 00:22:20,338 Maybe he likes me. 437 00:22:20,423 --> 00:22:23,967 I think we're wasting our time here. 438 00:22:24,051 --> 00:22:25,719 It's your job to protect people. 439 00:22:25,803 --> 00:22:27,846 Couldn't agree more. 440 00:22:27,930 --> 00:22:31,016 After hearing both sides of the story, you are hereby expelled. 441 00:22:31,100 --> 00:22:33,643 I will not have one student threatening the life of another. 442 00:22:33,728 --> 00:22:36,312 If you don't think this is fair, you can appeal to the school board. 443 00:22:36,397 --> 00:22:38,148 You'll leave campus immediately. 444 00:22:40,651 --> 00:22:42,610 I appreciate your time. 445 00:22:50,244 --> 00:22:52,162 - Thank you. - Enjoy your wedding. 446 00:22:52,246 --> 00:22:54,164 [School Bell Rings] 447 00:22:58,753 --> 00:23:00,628 [Door Opens] 448 00:23:00,755 --> 00:23:02,839 [Door Closes] [Chuckles Nervously] 449 00:23:02,923 --> 00:23:04,966 Never learned how to tie a tie. 450 00:23:05,051 --> 00:23:06,968 Sit down, Frankenteen. 451 00:23:09,180 --> 00:23:11,056 I'm guessing you know that you're losing it. 452 00:23:11,140 --> 00:23:13,975 I mean, Sam is clearly the new Glee favorite. 453 00:23:14,060 --> 00:23:15,727 He's gonna become starting quarterback. 454 00:23:15,853 --> 00:23:20,106 What's your point? My point is that you need a coolness injection. 455 00:23:20,191 --> 00:23:22,484 If you were honest and told people that we did it last year, 456 00:23:22,568 --> 00:23:24,819 you would go from uncool to Chilly Willy in a heartbeat. 457 00:23:24,904 --> 00:23:26,821 Maybe, but I can't do that. 458 00:23:27,907 --> 00:23:29,491 Wait. What? 459 00:23:32,036 --> 00:23:35,705 There's something I have to tell you. I didn't have sex with Jesse. 460 00:23:38,959 --> 00:23:42,796 I... I lied... to make you jealous. 461 00:23:42,880 --> 00:23:44,714 It's cool. Um... 462 00:23:44,799 --> 00:23:47,884 You know, I had a feeling, considering how much of a prude you are with me. 463 00:23:48,010 --> 00:23:49,969 Not that I'm complaining. This is so much better, 464 00:23:50,054 --> 00:23:54,557 because now neither of us have done it and we can save it for each other. 465 00:23:55,226 --> 00:23:56,810 Awesome. 466 00:23:56,936 --> 00:23:59,771 If she found out, she'd break up with me. And this would be bad because... 467 00:23:59,855 --> 00:24:02,190 Because I'm in love with her, and I don't want to hurt her feelings. 468 00:24:02,274 --> 00:24:04,609 Don't you see that that midget is like an anchor... 469 00:24:04,693 --> 00:24:06,945 dragging you down to the depths of Loserville? 470 00:24:07,029 --> 00:24:10,031 Stop it, Santana. That's my girlfriend. I think you should leave. 471 00:24:10,116 --> 00:24:11,658 All right. 472 00:24:11,742 --> 00:24:13,368 Maybe I'll tell her. 473 00:24:13,452 --> 00:24:16,204 I mean, if you two broke up, we'd be free to see each other, right? 474 00:24:16,288 --> 00:24:19,082 Hey. What are you guys doing? 475 00:24:19,166 --> 00:24:21,709 Nothing. I was just leaving. 476 00:24:25,840 --> 00:24:28,258 Aren't you gonna tell me how pretty I look? 477 00:24:29,844 --> 00:24:32,011 [Exhales] You look amazing. 478 00:24:33,681 --> 00:24:34,764 What? 479 00:24:34,849 --> 00:24:36,391 I... 480 00:24:37,476 --> 00:24:39,394 I just really love you. 481 00:24:39,478 --> 00:24:41,104 I love you too. 482 00:24:41,188 --> 00:24:44,941 ♪♪ [Pop] 483 00:24:54,285 --> 00:24:56,494 ♪ It's a beautiful night ♪ 484 00:24:56,579 --> 00:25:00,665 ♪ We're looking for something dumb to do ♪ 485 00:25:00,749 --> 00:25:02,625 ♪ Hey, baby ♪ 486 00:25:02,710 --> 00:25:05,587 ♪ I think I wanna marry you ♪ 487 00:25:07,256 --> 00:25:09,674 ♪ Is it the look in your eyes ♪ 488 00:25:09,758 --> 00:25:13,553 ♪ Or is it this dancing juice ♪ 489 00:25:13,637 --> 00:25:15,680 ♪ Who cares, baby ♪ 490 00:25:15,764 --> 00:25:18,433 ♪ I think I wanna marry you ♪ 491 00:25:20,269 --> 00:25:25,648 ♪ Well, I know this little chapel on the boulevard We can go ♪ 492 00:25:25,733 --> 00:25:29,694 ♪ No one will know ♪ 493 00:25:29,778 --> 00:25:32,947 ♪ Oh, come on, girl ♪ 494 00:25:33,032 --> 00:25:38,661 ♪ Who cares if we're trashed Got a pocket full of cash we can blow ♪ 495 00:25:38,746 --> 00:25:41,664 ♪ Shots of Patrón ♪ 496 00:25:42,666 --> 00:25:46,002 ♪ And it's on, girl ♪ 497 00:25:46,086 --> 00:25:49,255 ♪ Don't say no, no, no, no, no ♪ 498 00:25:49,340 --> 00:25:51,966 ♪ Just say yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 499 00:25:52,051 --> 00:25:55,720 ♪ And we'll go, go, go, go, go ♪ 500 00:25:55,804 --> 00:25:58,932 ♪ If you're ready like I'm ready ♪ 501 00:25:59,016 --> 00:26:01,351 ♪ 'Cause it's a beautiful night ♪ 502 00:26:01,435 --> 00:26:04,437 ♪ We're looking for something dumb to do ♪ 503 00:26:05,314 --> 00:26:07,315 ♪ Hey, baby ♪ 504 00:26:07,399 --> 00:26:10,318 ♪ I think I wanna marry you ♪ 505 00:26:11,987 --> 00:26:14,656 - ♪ Is it the look in your eyes ♪ - ♪♪ [All Vocalizing] 506 00:26:14,740 --> 00:26:18,326 - ♪ Or is it this dancing juice ♪ - ♪♪ [Vocalizing Continues] 507 00:26:18,410 --> 00:26:20,536 ♪ Who cares, baby ♪ 508 00:26:20,621 --> 00:26:23,331 ♪ I think I wanna marry you ♪ 509 00:26:24,333 --> 00:26:30,171 ♪ Just say "I do" ♪ 510 00:26:30,256 --> 00:26:34,175 - ♪♪ [Vocalizing Continues] - ♪ Tell me right now, baby ♪ 511 00:26:34,301 --> 00:26:38,137 ♪ Tell me right now baby, baby ♪ ♪ Just say "I do" ♪ 512 00:26:38,222 --> 00:26:40,265 ♪ 'Cause it's a beautiful night ♪ 513 00:26:40,349 --> 00:26:44,269 ♪ We're looking for something dumb to do ♪ 514 00:26:44,353 --> 00:26:46,271 ♪ Hey, baby ♪ 515 00:26:46,355 --> 00:26:50,149 - ♪ I think I wanna marry you ♪ - ♪♪ [Vocalizing Continues] 516 00:26:50,234 --> 00:26:51,484 ♪ Just say "I do" ♪ 517 00:26:51,568 --> 00:26:53,569 ♪ Is it the look in your eyes ♪ 518 00:26:53,654 --> 00:26:57,073 ♪ Or is it this dancing juice ♪ 519 00:26:57,157 --> 00:26:59,450 ♪ Who cares, baby ♪ 520 00:26:59,535 --> 00:27:01,619 ♪ I think I wanna marry you ♪♪ 521 00:27:01,704 --> 00:27:04,872 [Audience Cheering] 522 00:27:09,378 --> 00:27:11,045 [Minister] Please, be seated. 523 00:27:11,130 --> 00:27:14,299 We usually start with a prayer, 524 00:27:14,383 --> 00:27:17,635 but a certain young wedding planner, who shall remain nameless, 525 00:27:17,720 --> 00:27:20,305 was afraid that some in attendance might fall asleep. 526 00:27:20,389 --> 00:27:22,765 So instead, I'm going to let Burt and Carole... 527 00:27:22,850 --> 00:27:26,519 tell you in their own words why they've invited you here today. 528 00:27:28,105 --> 00:27:32,233 I'm not really known for having a way with words. Uh... 529 00:27:32,318 --> 00:27:37,322 You know, when you're a kid, adults will tell you a lot of things. 530 00:27:37,406 --> 00:27:43,828 But one thing they neglect to mention is how... sad life can be. 531 00:27:43,912 --> 00:27:46,998 I lost somebody I loved very much. 532 00:27:47,082 --> 00:27:51,252 But Kurt... he lost his mom. 533 00:27:52,379 --> 00:27:55,173 And that killed me. 534 00:27:55,257 --> 00:27:59,927 You know, we got by, but looking back... I want to apologize to you, Kurt. 535 00:28:00,012 --> 00:28:04,599 What we were living just... wasn't living. 536 00:28:04,683 --> 00:28:09,854 You know that saying that when God closes a door, he opens a window? 537 00:28:09,938 --> 00:28:14,609 Well... [Chuckles] Sometimes, out of nowhere, he'll do you one better, 538 00:28:14,693 --> 00:28:16,402 and he'll kick a whole wall down. 539 00:28:16,487 --> 00:28:18,988 - [Chuckles, Sniffles] - He grabbed me by the shoulders, 540 00:28:19,073 --> 00:28:23,659 and he pointed me towards this woman right here. 541 00:28:23,744 --> 00:28:27,288 And he said, "There she is. 542 00:28:27,373 --> 00:28:30,249 Go get her." 543 00:28:30,334 --> 00:28:32,293 You're everything, Carole. 544 00:28:33,629 --> 00:28:35,671 Words can't describe you. 545 00:28:35,756 --> 00:28:37,507 You're everything. 546 00:28:37,591 --> 00:28:41,344 And I will love you till the day I die. 547 00:28:41,428 --> 00:28:45,723 - [Carole Sniffles] Okay. - [Burt Chuckles] 548 00:28:45,808 --> 00:28:47,934 I'm lucky. 549 00:28:48,018 --> 00:28:51,187 Most women, when they get married, they get one man. 550 00:28:51,271 --> 00:28:52,772 I get two. 551 00:28:53,816 --> 00:28:56,734 One of you saved me from my wardrobe, 552 00:28:56,819 --> 00:28:58,778 the other one just saved me. 553 00:29:01,615 --> 00:29:05,076 Kurt, you are an amazing person. 554 00:29:05,160 --> 00:29:08,413 I'm not only getting a son, I'm getting a friend. 555 00:29:08,497 --> 00:29:11,707 Finn, I know you were resistant at first, 556 00:29:11,792 --> 00:29:13,584 but I am so proud of you. 557 00:29:13,669 --> 00:29:17,088 I've watched you grow into a man. 558 00:29:17,172 --> 00:29:21,634 But I think I'm most proud that you've become a brother to Kurt. 559 00:29:24,805 --> 00:29:26,889 We are four people... 560 00:29:28,350 --> 00:29:30,017 becoming a family. 561 00:29:31,979 --> 00:29:34,063 [Minister] Okay. [Chuckles] 562 00:29:34,189 --> 00:29:36,983 [Sighs, Chuckles] Oh. [Chuckles] 563 00:29:37,067 --> 00:29:39,277 - Burt, do you take Carole... - You bet I do. 564 00:29:39,361 --> 00:29:41,112 [Audience Laughs] 565 00:29:41,238 --> 00:29:44,699 And do you, Carole, take this man... Oh, yes, I do. Yes, I do. 566 00:29:44,783 --> 00:29:47,702 [Applause, Cheering] 567 00:29:51,707 --> 00:29:53,374 Whoo! 568 00:29:55,586 --> 00:29:57,086 [Man] Yeah! 569 00:29:59,173 --> 00:30:01,340 ♪♪ [Latin Pop] 570 00:30:05,846 --> 00:30:09,307 ♪ When marimba rhythms start to play ♪ 571 00:30:09,391 --> 00:30:13,436 ♪ Dance with me Make me sway ♪ 572 00:30:13,520 --> 00:30:16,981 ♪ Like a lazy ocean hugs the shore ♪ 573 00:30:17,065 --> 00:30:21,027 ♪ Hold me close Sway me more ♪ 574 00:30:21,111 --> 00:30:25,323 ♪ Other dancers may be on the floor, dear ♪ 575 00:30:25,407 --> 00:30:28,701 ♪ But my eyes will see only you ♪ 576 00:30:28,785 --> 00:30:32,663 ♪ Only you have that magic technique ♪ 577 00:30:32,748 --> 00:30:35,917 ♪ When we sway, I go weak ♪ 578 00:30:36,001 --> 00:30:41,631 ♪ When marimba rhythms start to play dance with me ♪ 579 00:30:41,715 --> 00:30:44,008 ♪ Make me sway ♪ 580 00:30:44,092 --> 00:30:47,512 ♪ Like a lazy ocean hugs the shore ♪ 581 00:30:47,596 --> 00:30:51,098 - ♪ Hold me close Sway me more ♪ - [Mouthing Words] 582 00:30:53,310 --> 00:30:56,270 ♪ Like a flower bending in the breeze ♪ 583 00:30:56,355 --> 00:31:01,025 ♪ Bend with me Sway with ease ♪ 584 00:31:01,109 --> 00:31:04,570 ♪ When we dance you have a way with me ♪ 585 00:31:04,655 --> 00:31:09,951 ♪ Stay with me Sway with me ♪♪ 586 00:31:10,035 --> 00:31:10,952 Whoo! 587 00:31:11,036 --> 00:31:13,829 - [Indistinct] - Whoo! Whoo! 588 00:31:13,914 --> 00:31:15,748 [Indistinct] 589 00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:20,920 And now I'd like to introduce one of the best men: 590 00:31:21,004 --> 00:31:22,129 Finn Hudson. 591 00:31:24,841 --> 00:31:27,552 - All right? - You did good. It did the trick. 592 00:31:28,679 --> 00:31:30,638 Oh. Thanks. 593 00:31:31,640 --> 00:31:33,891 Hi. Uh, thank you. 594 00:31:33,976 --> 00:31:36,227 Best man. 595 00:31:36,311 --> 00:31:38,396 Right. Uh... 596 00:31:38,480 --> 00:31:41,399 Well, I want to propose a toast to my mom, 597 00:31:41,483 --> 00:31:43,776 who is so awesome. 598 00:31:45,112 --> 00:31:49,365 Uh, I mean, somehow, even without one in the house, 599 00:31:49,449 --> 00:31:51,659 you taught me what it means to be a man. 600 00:31:53,412 --> 00:31:56,664 In Glee Club, uh, whenever two of us got together, 601 00:31:57,499 --> 00:31:59,208 we got a nickname. 602 00:31:59,293 --> 00:32:01,002 Rachel and I are Finnchel. 603 00:32:01,086 --> 00:32:03,546 Rachel and Puck were Puckleberry. 604 00:32:03,630 --> 00:32:06,048 And today, a new union was formed. 605 00:32:06,800 --> 00:32:08,175 Furt. 606 00:32:10,679 --> 00:32:12,597 You and me, man. 607 00:32:12,681 --> 00:32:15,016 We're brothers from another mother. 608 00:32:15,100 --> 00:32:19,270 And quite frankly, no one else has shown me as much as you... 609 00:32:19,354 --> 00:32:21,314 about what it means to be a man. 610 00:32:22,232 --> 00:32:24,984 And over the past few weeks, uh, 611 00:32:25,068 --> 00:32:29,363 some stuff's gone down, and I haven't manned up like I should've. 612 00:32:31,199 --> 00:32:33,034 From now on, 613 00:32:33,118 --> 00:32:35,161 no matter what it costs me, I got your back. 614 00:32:36,538 --> 00:32:37,997 Okay? 615 00:32:39,916 --> 00:32:42,668 Even if it means getting a Slushee in the face every now and then. 616 00:32:42,753 --> 00:32:44,170 [Audience Chuckles] 617 00:32:44,254 --> 00:32:48,215 You put this entire wedding together by yourself, Kurt. 618 00:32:50,177 --> 00:32:53,596 So, as a thank-you, I had the Glee Club put together a little number in your honor. 619 00:32:56,141 --> 00:32:58,267 You're gonna dance it with me, dude. 620 00:32:58,352 --> 00:32:59,935 - ♪♪ [Vocalizing] - [Mouths Word] 621 00:33:02,105 --> 00:33:05,107 ♪♪ [Vocalizing Continues] 622 00:33:14,618 --> 00:33:17,703 ♪ Oh, her eyes, her eyes ♪ 623 00:33:17,788 --> 00:33:19,997 ♪ Make the stars look like they're not shinin' ♪ 624 00:33:20,082 --> 00:33:24,251 ♪ Her hair, her hair falls perfectly without her tryin' ♪ 625 00:33:24,336 --> 00:33:26,921 ♪ She's so beautiful ♪ 626 00:33:27,005 --> 00:33:30,925 ♪ And I tell her every day ♪ 627 00:33:32,260 --> 00:33:34,845 ♪ Oh, you know you know, you know ♪ 628 00:33:34,930 --> 00:33:37,306 ♪ I'd never ask you to change ♪ 629 00:33:37,391 --> 00:33:41,644 ♪ If perfect's what you're searching for then just stay the same ♪ 630 00:33:41,728 --> 00:33:45,815 ♪ So, don't even bother asking if you look okay ♪ 631 00:33:45,899 --> 00:33:48,984 ♪ You know I'll say ♪ 632 00:33:49,069 --> 00:33:51,946 ♪ When I see your face ♪ 633 00:33:52,030 --> 00:33:53,197 ♪♪ [Vocalizing] 634 00:33:53,281 --> 00:33:58,369 ♪ There's not a thing that I would change ♪ 635 00:33:58,453 --> 00:34:01,372 - ♪ 'Cause you're amazing ♪ - ♪ You're amazing ♪ 636 00:34:01,456 --> 00:34:05,459 ♪ Just the way you are ♪ 637 00:34:07,003 --> 00:34:10,840 - ♪ And when you smile ♪ - ♪ When you smile ♪ 638 00:34:10,924 --> 00:34:15,845 ♪ The whole world stops and stares for a while ♪ 639 00:34:15,929 --> 00:34:17,638 ♪ 'Cause, girl, you're amazing ♪ 640 00:34:17,723 --> 00:34:18,973 ♪ You're amazing ♪ 641 00:34:19,057 --> 00:34:23,686 ♪ Just the way you are ♪ 642 00:34:23,770 --> 00:34:33,237 ♪ The way you are ♪ 643 00:34:33,321 --> 00:34:36,657 ♪ Girl, you're amazing ♪ 644 00:34:36,742 --> 00:34:40,369 ♪ Just the way you are ♪ 645 00:34:41,788 --> 00:34:45,166 ♪ When I see your face ♪ 646 00:34:46,752 --> 00:34:51,213 ♪ There's not a thing that I would change ♪ 647 00:34:51,339 --> 00:34:54,341 ♪ 'Cause you're amazing ♪ ♪ You're amazing ♪ 648 00:34:54,426 --> 00:34:58,220 ♪ Just the way you are ♪ 649 00:34:59,848 --> 00:35:02,224 ♪ And when you smile ♪ 650 00:35:04,102 --> 00:35:08,314 ♪ The whole world stops and stares for a while ♪ 651 00:35:08,398 --> 00:35:11,650 ♪ 'Cause, girl, you're amazing ♪ 652 00:35:11,735 --> 00:35:15,738 ♪ Just the way you are ♪ 653 00:35:17,282 --> 00:35:18,574 ♪ Yeah ♪♪ 654 00:35:30,337 --> 00:35:34,256 Well, I hope the real wedding is more exciting than the rehearsal. 655 00:35:34,341 --> 00:35:36,217 You know what, Jeannie? 656 00:35:36,301 --> 00:35:39,386 There's nothing like spending time with my girls. 657 00:35:39,471 --> 00:35:41,597 Then why did you have to leave us? 658 00:35:41,681 --> 00:35:44,642 I was busy. I was busy keeping you safe. 659 00:35:44,726 --> 00:35:47,645 Those Nazis... they're... they're nasty people. 660 00:35:47,729 --> 00:35:51,232 You got the illustrated copy of Mein Kampf I sent you, right? 661 00:35:51,358 --> 00:35:53,776 Yes, I did. Thank you. You're welcome. 662 00:35:53,860 --> 00:35:57,571 ♪♪ [Synthesizer: "Here Comes The Bride"] 663 00:35:57,656 --> 00:36:00,199 Oh, what in the G.D. Hell? 664 00:36:00,283 --> 00:36:03,702 ♪♪ [Continues] 665 00:36:10,085 --> 00:36:12,086 - That's enough. - ♪♪ [Stops] 666 00:36:14,130 --> 00:36:16,173 Dearly beloved, we are gathered today... 667 00:36:16,258 --> 00:36:19,885 to join Sue Sylvester and Sue Sylvester in holy matrimony. 668 00:36:19,970 --> 00:36:22,847 - Jeannie, give me the rings. - This is insane. 669 00:36:22,931 --> 00:36:26,892 Sue, do you take Sue to be your lawfully wedded spouse? 670 00:36:28,728 --> 00:36:30,145 I do. 671 00:36:31,064 --> 00:36:32,439 And, Sue, 672 00:36:32,524 --> 00:36:35,234 do you take Sue to be your lawfully wedded spouse? 673 00:36:37,237 --> 00:36:38,445 I do. 674 00:36:41,366 --> 00:36:43,492 By the power vested in me by a Web site, 675 00:36:43,577 --> 00:36:46,287 I hereby pronounce you Sue and Sue. 676 00:36:47,247 --> 00:36:48,706 You may kiss yourself. 677 00:36:48,790 --> 00:36:51,166 ♪♪ [Synthesizer: "Oh My Darling, Clementine"] 678 00:36:51,251 --> 00:36:53,168 I'm sorry. I'm sorry, but this is crazy. 679 00:36:53,295 --> 00:36:55,212 This whole thing is crazy. ♪♪ [Stops] 680 00:36:55,297 --> 00:36:59,383 I had my heart set on singing during the ceremony. 681 00:36:59,467 --> 00:37:02,052 I don't want to be singing as you're walking out. 682 00:37:02,137 --> 00:37:05,014 I want to have a special moment with you girls. 683 00:37:05,098 --> 00:37:09,143 We girls have had lots of special moments, Mother. You just weren't there. 684 00:37:09,227 --> 00:37:12,313 I resent that. And I also resent the fact... 685 00:37:12,397 --> 00:37:14,815 that you are keeping me in the background... 686 00:37:14,900 --> 00:37:16,567 at my own daughter's wedding, 687 00:37:16,651 --> 00:37:19,445 which, I am sorry to say, I still think is bizarre. 688 00:37:19,529 --> 00:37:21,822 You know when I finally began to like who I am? 689 00:37:21,907 --> 00:37:23,824 When I stopped trying to please you. 690 00:37:23,909 --> 00:37:26,911 So Jean and I had to learn how to become our own family, 691 00:37:26,995 --> 00:37:31,290 and you can't just waltz in here after all this time and start calling the shots. 692 00:37:31,374 --> 00:37:34,960 You're a bully, Mother. It's taken till now to realize it, but you are a bully. 693 00:37:35,045 --> 00:37:36,670 I am not. 694 00:37:36,755 --> 00:37:39,048 Mother, I cannot remember a conversation with you... 695 00:37:39,132 --> 00:37:42,301 where I didn't walk away feeling worse about myself. 696 00:37:42,385 --> 00:37:45,846 Well, you know what, Susan? I'm disappointed in you. 697 00:37:45,931 --> 00:37:48,307 I'm sorry to say, Mother. You are no longer invited to my wedding. 698 00:37:48,433 --> 00:37:51,310 What about my song? You're welcome to sing "The Sound of Silence"... 699 00:37:51,394 --> 00:37:53,354 in your hotel room right now. 700 00:37:54,606 --> 00:37:57,066 [Scoffs] All right. 701 00:38:03,406 --> 00:38:07,701 And to think I was going to send you to Israel for your honeymoon. 702 00:38:07,786 --> 00:38:09,703 They love me there. 703 00:38:10,497 --> 00:38:12,498 You look beautiful. 704 00:38:14,042 --> 00:38:16,001 I feel beautiful. 705 00:38:16,836 --> 00:38:19,129 [School Bell Rings] 706 00:38:19,255 --> 00:38:21,966 Hi. Arnica. Twice a day. 707 00:38:22,050 --> 00:38:23,759 It'll help your bruise. 708 00:38:23,843 --> 00:38:25,594 Thanks. 709 00:38:25,679 --> 00:38:28,389 I've been thinking a lot about what you did for Kurt. 710 00:38:28,473 --> 00:38:30,349 It made a real impact. 711 00:38:30,475 --> 00:38:34,144 I thought the only impact that was made was Karofsky's fist impacting my face. 712 00:38:34,229 --> 00:38:37,731 You saw what Finn did at the wedding. That was because of you. 713 00:38:38,733 --> 00:38:40,651 We've been talking this whole time, 714 00:38:40,735 --> 00:38:42,903 and you haven't even noticed that I'm wearing your ring. 715 00:38:45,115 --> 00:38:48,450 How'd you get that? I broke into your locker. 716 00:38:48,535 --> 00:38:50,452 I've always been really handy with a nail file. 717 00:38:50,537 --> 00:38:52,413 Really? Mmm. 718 00:39:00,338 --> 00:39:02,715 Yes. [School Bell Rings] 719 00:39:02,799 --> 00:39:04,383 This is absolutely unacceptable. 720 00:39:04,467 --> 00:39:06,427 This psycho threatens my kid's life, 721 00:39:06,511 --> 00:39:09,304 and some school board, made up of a bunch of people I've never met, 722 00:39:09,389 --> 00:39:11,306 tells me there's nothing they can do about it? 723 00:39:11,391 --> 00:39:14,101 Oh, they could do something about it. They just decided not to. 724 00:39:14,185 --> 00:39:16,770 No one reported witnessing him being violent, 725 00:39:16,855 --> 00:39:19,606 and there's no way to prove that he threatened you with violence. 726 00:39:19,691 --> 00:39:22,151 The school board president issued a verbal warning to Karofsky, 727 00:39:22,235 --> 00:39:23,902 and that's where we stand. 728 00:39:23,987 --> 00:39:26,030 I can't go back to being terrified all the time. 729 00:39:26,114 --> 00:39:29,742 I jump every time a locker slams shut. I flinch whenever I turn the corner. 730 00:39:29,826 --> 00:39:31,744 I don't feel safe at the school. 731 00:39:31,828 --> 00:39:35,914 Kids who bully, for the most part, have been bullied themselves. 732 00:39:35,999 --> 00:39:39,460 And I, for one, don't flatter myself that that behavior can change. 733 00:39:39,544 --> 00:39:43,047 Now, this kid Karofsky isn't gonna all of a sudden be nice to you, 734 00:39:43,131 --> 00:39:45,883 and I won't stand by unable to do anything about it. 735 00:39:45,967 --> 00:39:49,053 Effective noon tomorrow, Figgins is back in charge, 736 00:39:49,137 --> 00:39:52,765 as I have tendered my resignation as principal in protest. 737 00:39:52,849 --> 00:39:54,892 I can't help you behind that desk, 738 00:39:54,976 --> 00:39:57,853 but I can be an extra pair of eyes out in those hallways. 739 00:39:57,937 --> 00:39:59,813 Someone ought to have your back. 740 00:39:59,898 --> 00:40:02,983 Besides, I miss my office. This room smells weird. 741 00:40:03,068 --> 00:40:06,153 I can't shake the feeling that I'm inhaling a lot of dead skin. 742 00:40:10,325 --> 00:40:13,911 Well, I guess I'll try to enjoy the rest of the day, before the terror starts anew. 743 00:40:13,995 --> 00:40:15,954 I'll see you at home. 744 00:40:17,999 --> 00:40:21,960 Hey, Kurt. Wait up a second. There's something we want to talk to you about. 745 00:40:22,087 --> 00:40:23,087 [School Bell Rings] [Chattering] 746 00:40:23,171 --> 00:40:25,380 Come on, guys. The wedding was great, 747 00:40:25,465 --> 00:40:28,258 but we have got to get ready for sectionals next week. 748 00:40:28,343 --> 00:40:30,135 Kurt. Good. Oh. 749 00:40:30,220 --> 00:40:33,764 I wanna talk to you about this amazing idea I had for a solo for you at sectionals. 750 00:40:33,848 --> 00:40:36,183 - Can I make an announcement first? - Yeah. 751 00:40:37,894 --> 00:40:40,729 First, I wanted to thank everyone for what you did at my dad's wedding, 752 00:40:40,814 --> 00:40:42,189 especially Finn. 753 00:40:42,273 --> 00:40:44,650 It's nice to know that I have great friends here, 754 00:40:44,734 --> 00:40:46,527 as well as a true brother, 755 00:40:47,612 --> 00:40:50,572 which is why it's so hard for me to leave. 756 00:40:51,825 --> 00:40:53,909 What do you mean "leave"? 757 00:40:53,993 --> 00:40:59,081 I'm transferring to Dalton Academy, immediately. 758 00:40:59,165 --> 00:41:01,959 My parents are using the money they saved up for their honeymoon... 759 00:41:02,043 --> 00:41:03,961 to pay for the tuition. 760 00:41:04,045 --> 00:41:05,754 Kurt, you can't leave. 761 00:41:05,839 --> 00:41:09,216 What the hell, dude? How about you talk with me about this first? 762 00:41:09,300 --> 00:41:12,427 I'm sorry, Finn, but there's nothing to talk about. 763 00:41:12,512 --> 00:41:15,430 Karofsky's coming back tomorrow, so that means I won't be. 764 00:41:15,557 --> 00:41:17,141 We can protect you. Seriously. 765 00:41:17,267 --> 00:41:20,060 - We can form a perimeter around you, like the Secret Service. - Yeah. 766 00:41:20,145 --> 00:41:23,272 The only thing that can really protect me is what they have at Dalton: 767 00:41:23,356 --> 00:41:24,982 A zero-tolerance no bullying policy. 768 00:41:25,066 --> 00:41:26,733 It's enforced. 769 00:41:26,818 --> 00:41:30,195 Um, does this mean that you're gonna be competing against us at sectionals? 770 00:41:32,240 --> 00:41:33,740 Kurt. 771 00:41:40,582 --> 00:41:43,041 I'm sorry. I... 772 00:41:43,126 --> 00:41:45,085 I have to go. 773 00:41:48,756 --> 00:41:50,883 [School Bell Rings] 774 00:41:52,927 --> 00:41:56,722 ♪♪ [Vocalizing] 775 00:41:56,806 --> 00:42:01,435 ♪♪ [Harmonic Vocalizing] 776 00:42:17,452 --> 00:42:19,286 ♪♪ [Ends] 777 00:42:27,795 --> 00:42:28,795 English - US - PSDH